Review Category: Movie

On Halloween in 1976, a group of carnival
workers (Moon Zombie et al) are on the road when they are suddenly stopped and
brutally kidnapped by a masked gang. They wake up in a satanic abandoned
factory, a playground for a group of sadistic Brits dressed as aristocrats (led
by Malcolm McDowell) who initiate a game of ‘31’. 31 ‘is hell’ and the group
have to survive the night, with each one being assigned a number and odds on
them surviving. The odds are long, and so is the night. And so begins ‘Rob
Zombie’s Running Man’.

Each stage has a murderous clown to escape
(what is it with Zombie and clowns?). We start with Sick-Head (Moler), a small,
Spanish speaking person dressed as Hitler. And he’s one of the more normal
ones.  Of course, not all of the group
survive as they also have to face Psycho-Head and Schizo-Head (Temple and Ury),
Sex-Head and Death-Head (Daily and Voges), and the most ruthless of all,
Doom-Head (Brake).

Not one for the weak-stomached, Zombie fans
will get exactly what they expect – a lot of fucked up dialogue, gore,
over-acting and general nastiness. You get the impression that a new game of 31
will be starting up next year…

31 / CERT: TBC / DIRECTOR & SCREENPLAY: ROB ZOMBIE / STARRING: SHERI MOON ZOMBIE, MALCOLM MCDOWELL, RICHARD BRAKE, JEFF DANIEL PHILLIPS, MEG FOSTER / RELEASE DATE: TBC
 

In the near-future, Marc (Hughes) is
diagnosed with cancer and has been given one year left to live. He decides to
cryogenically preserve his body, leaving behind the love of his life Naomi
(Chaplin) and taking some control over his own fate. In 2084, he becomes the
first person to be resuscitated from cryopreservation by the Prodigy company’s
‘Lazarus Project’.

The future is not what he expected. People
look younger and beautiful, and are no longer ‘slaves to love’ as his caring
nurse (Le Bon) tells him. There’s even sex groups. However, Marc soon realises
he’s traded everything for ‘an inadequate dream’. Despite the marvels of modern
medicine, his body is still in pretty bad shape and he’s stuck inside the
hospital, dependant on a machine to keep him alive and barely allowed outside
apart from the occasional PR fundraiser, due to the fact his lungs might not
handle the future’s atmosphere.

The theme of memory is prevalent – Marc has
his uploaded from a chip, and he mulls over his life and his past love and
wonders if it was worth it. He finds out Naomi also preserved herself much
later in life, in the hope they’d meet again. But would it be ethically right
to wake her up and risk her wellbeing? Marc struggles to adapt to the future
and his trapped existence, especially when he finds out more about the project
he has the ability to save or ruin.

REALIVE is a bold movie, likely to become a
modern sci-fi favourite. It’s very reminiscent of Abre Los Ojos (Gil wrote the
screenplay for the remake Vanilla Sky). There’s hints of Frankenstein and even
last year’s Equals, as humanity, the afterlife and ethics are explored in
emotional detail. Definitely one to make you think.

REALIVE / CERT: TBC / DIRECTOR AND SCREENPLAY:  MATEO GIL / STARRING: TOM HUGHES, CHARLOTTE LE BON, OONA CHAPLIN, BARRY WARD, JULIO PERILLAN / RELEASE DATE: TBC
 

Ladies, gents and folks in between, we are in the realm of comedy zombies, tit shots and wickedly wry humour chucked in for great measure.

Writer/director Andy Edwards’ Ibiza Undead is an enjoyable romp in the tradition of Shaun of the Dead, although in terms of taste it is more in line with Cockneys vs Zombies, which joyfully allows it to be its own beast. The basic premise sees a group of lads (and a hanger on ex-girlfriend) travel to Ibiza to get drunk and (hopefully) pull. Only airport checks have expanded to include zombie infection screening as undeadness apparently works in the same way as sexually transmitted infections. You can guess the rest.

The script is sharp with fantastically observed off-the-cuff quips to balance out the wang-dangling banter that is the guys’ main means of communication. What’s more impressive, Edwards somehow (and against all expectations, given the prior tone) manages to wring some proper sentimentality from the narrative arc without the story feeling overlong. This is underpinned by some witty prop work and cinematography that stops the more tender moments from paddling off into a mucky pool of slush.

The cast are… well, weird. A lot of the time, the younger players are a little too wooden for comfort and there’s the sign of inexperience when they miss beats and pause in argument scenes when they should be responding instantly. That said, the lack of depth actually goes in the lads’ favour in places as it emphasises that their posturing is basically terrified bravado often blossoming at the sheer thought of a breast. It’s a paralysis that sometimes becomes a little too literal.

Standout performers, however, include Thomas Worthington as clubber Gunter. He’s on screen for maybe a minute, but absolutely steals it with riotous charisma and perfect comic timing. Similar is Homer Todiwala as Az, who shows early on that he has screen presence and adds depth and a lively streak of believable slapstick as he goes. Of the ladies, Marcia Do Vales is the marvellous Maria. For all that she’s obviously set up as cheap totty, by hell that girl is terrifying (and terrific) when she’s in full flow! She provides believability rather than just volume, which is welcome as shouting is often a shortcut for actors in these types of roles. Adding colour to the motley crew are Matt King (Peep Show’s Super Hans) as the gangsterish Karl and Michael Wragg as Torval, a taxi driver on his own permanent trip. Both are believable in a slightly bonkers way.

Ibiza Undead bites the balls off your average (rom) zom-com. What it lacks in some seasoned performers it makes up for in pure, putrefied pizzazz. Yet, for all its ‘ard man posturing, it is an equal opportunities stalkathon and is all the more intriguing for it.

IBIZA UNDEAD / CERT: TBC / DIRECTOR & SCREENPLAY: ANDY EDWARDS / STARRING: CARA THEOBOLD, EMLY ATACK, ALGINA LIPSKIS / RELEASE DATE: TBC

Brothers Gordon (Skipper) and John (Williamson) reluctantly meet up to pack away the contents of their father’s video store after he’s been missing and presumed dead for seven months.  The brothers have grown apart and it seems the only thing they have in common is their love for the old days of video. They decide to explore their dad’s office, finding a video board game called ‘Beyond the Gates’ that opens up a portal to another world.  Gordon’s girlfriend (Grant) joins them, creeped out by the game’s hostess (Crampton) who seems a little too aware of them.

The game has deadly consequences, but it won’t let them finish playing no matter how hard they try.  The brothers realise finishing the game holds the key to saving their father, although it might kill them all in the process. Imagine Jumanji as a horror and you get the gist.

Beyond the Gates is a nice little throwback to the ‘80s – a homage to VHS stores and those video board games (remember Atmosfear?) that sadly have been criminally left behind while lesser deserving culture has made a comeback under the guide of retro. It does well with its limited budget but deserves to be gorier and scarier, and could easily have a sequel.

The movie is definitely one for horror buffs; enjoyable and carefully curated with knowing winks to its audience. Jackson has a bright future.

BEYOND THE GATES / DIRECTOR: JACKSON STWEART / SCREENPLAY: STEPHEN SCARLETA, JACKSON STEWART / STARRING: GRAHAM SCIPPER, CHASE WILLIAMSON, BREA GRANT, JUSTIN WELBORN, BARBARA CRAMPTON
 

One glorious thing about films festivals is
you’ll often pick something at random that you might never normally get to
watch, and get blown away by it.  Step
forward BEYOND THE WALLS, a mini-series not a film, but coming in at around the
same length.

In modern-day (2015) France, speech
therapist Lisa (Baetens) is living a lonely life, purposefully avoiding social
interaction and relationships although you don’t really know why. One day, she
randomly inherits an old house across the road from her apartment. She has
never met the deceased owner, who laid dead in his armchair undiscovered for 30
years.

She moves in, instantly intrigued by the
layers of Rorschach painting wallpaper. She starts to hear noises and cries
from behind the wall and smashes through the bricks to investigate. There she
finds a door, which leads her into another house, or rather another world – a
supernatural Narnia where she is confronted by a strange man with a boar’s
head.  She runs away, meeting Julien
(Deblock) who rescues her.

Lisa is unable to find her way back out.
The house, which has hundreds of rooms and no windows, constantly changes, and
Julien explains he’s been in there for three to four years. Only Julien entered
the house from another era, and time works differently here.

Through Julien we learn about the house,
including ‘The Others’ – a group of men who have ‘accepted’ the house and seem
to do its evil bidding. It’s fitting they’re called that, as the ghostly
atmosphere of every scene reminds you of the namesake film, as well as Coraline
and Silent Hill – all of which are good things. Lisa joins Julien as they
continue to find a way out of the house – through the mysterious ‘red door’, a
clue left to Lisa by the owner of the house she inherited.

There are recurring themes of the human
psyche, dead ravens and burnt books, and even religious undertones and the
afterlife and how we deal with it.

Beyond the Walls absolutely mesmerises you
as you journey through this parallel world, learning about the house as Lisa
does, fully immersed in it and feeling a genuine sense of dread that something bad
could happen at any minute. The cinematography is incredible, despite the fact
the sets seem relatively simple and not a lot happens in several scenes. Its success
is how it completely captures the imagination, taking you back to a time when,
as a child, you read that book or watched that film that first truly scared and
engaged you.

Dream-like, imaginative, mesmerising and
full of menace and wonder – Beyond the Walls is yet another diamond in the
current ‘golden age of TV’ and deserves just as much attention as anything on Netflix,
Now or Amazon. Thankfully, it’s been added to new streaming service Shudder so
should be available more widely soon.

BEYOND THE WALLS / DIRECTOR: HERVE HADMAR / SCREENPLAY: HERVE HADMAR, MARC HERPOUX, SYLVIE CHANTEUX / STARRING: VEERLE BAETENS, FRANCOIS DEBLOCK, LILA-ROSE GILBERTI, GERALDINE CHAPLIN 
 

What do you do when the zombie apocalypse
is over, two billion people are dead, and everyone goes back to their boring
lives? Round up what’s left of the zombies, stick them all on a North African
island, and open up a zombie-shooting resort of course!

And that is basically the premise of The
Rezort. Although it sounds a bit silly, it’s actually quite a serious film, and
works well. Think Jurassic Park meets The Walking Dead/Dawn of the Dead/*insert
zombie reference here*, as director Steve Barker mused with Alan Jones before
the film was shown at FrightFest.

In a post-apocalyptic Britain, couple
Melanie (De Gouw) and Lewis (McCann) decide to go on holiday to The Rezort in
order to help lay the past to rest. Lewis served in the army, whereas Melanie
has never quite been the same since watching her dad turn into one of the
undead. The Rezort, run by businesswoman Valerie (Claire Goose), is something
of an island paradise, turning a blind eye to the impoverished refugees who
also live there, being helped by charity Hope4U. Melanie and Lewis are joined
by a couple of video game competition winners (Jassa Ahluwalia, Lawrence Walker),
a mysterious woman with her own agenda (Elen Rhys) and rich trigger-happy
American and Asian businessmen around the resort.

As Richard Attenborough could’ve told them,
a grand park with dangerous creatures doesn’t always work out, but at least the
group has grizzled veteran Archer (Dougray Scott) with them, who just happens
to be an expert zombie-killer.

While not an instant classic in the already
saturated zombie market, Barker’s third entry does deserve its place, as it’s
an enjoyable film with a premise that you think would’ve been done years ago.
Every zombie movie adds its own unique twist or convention to the canon and
this is no exception, with one particular zombie’s behaviour to look out for.

A welcome addition for zombie lovers, who
won’t be disappointed.

THE REZORT / DIRECTOR: STEVE BARKER / SCREENPLAY: PAUL GERSTENBERGER / STARRING: DOUGRAY SCOTT, JESSICA DE GOUW, MARTIN MCCANN, CLAIRE GOOSE 

What do you do when the zombie apocalypse
is over, two billion people are dead, and everyone goes back to their boring
lives? Round up what’s left of the zombies, stick them all on a North African
island, and open up a zombie-shooting resort of course!

And that is basically the premise of The
Rezort. Although it sounds a bit silly, it’s actually quite a serious film, and
works well. Think Jurassic Park meets The Walking Dead/Dawn of the Dead/*insert
zombie reference here*, as director Steve Barker mused with Alan Jones before
the film was shown at FrightFest.

In a post-apocalyptic Britain, couple
Melanie (De Gouw) and Lewis (McCann) decide to go on holiday to The Rezort in
order to help lay the past to rest. Lewis served in the army, whereas Melanie
has never quite been the same since watching her dad turn into one of the
undead. The Rezort, run by businesswoman Valerie (Claire Goose), is something
of an island paradise, turning a blind eye to the impoverished refugees who
also live there, being helped by charity Hope4U. Melanie and Lewis are joined
by a couple of video game competition winners (Jassa Ahluwalia, Lawrence Walker),
a mysterious woman with her own agenda (Elen Rhys) and rich trigger-happy
American and Asian businessmen around the resort.

As Richard Attenborough could’ve told them,
a grand park with dangerous creatures doesn’t always work out, but at least the
group has grizzled veteran Archer (Dougray Scott) with them, who just happens
to be an expert zombie-killer.

While not an instant classic in the already
saturated zombie market, Barker’s third entry does deserve its place, as it’s
an enjoyable film with a premise that you think would’ve been done years ago.
Every zombie movie adds its own unique twist or convention to the canon and
this is no exception, with one particular zombie’s behaviour to look out for.

A welcome addition for zombie lovers, who
won’t be disappointed.

THE REZORT / DIRECTOR: STEVE BARKER / SCREENPLAY: PAUL GERSTENBERGER / STARRING: DOUGRAY SCOTT, JESSICA DE GOUW, MARTIN MCCANN, CLAIRE GOOSE 

Imagine
Gremlins meets The Master and you just about have The Master Cleanse. Part body horror, part black comedy, this is a
well-acted film produced by its star Johnny Galecki. Galecki plays Paul, a lost
soul searching for more in life after being stood up at the altar and finding
himself stuck in a rut. He sees an advert for a free spiritual retreat, with
the tagline ‘let’s get pure’.  

He signs up, seemingly the only person
there genuinely seeking help.  He meets
Maggie (Friel), an actress lying about her reasons there, but hiding
something.  There’s also Eric (Gallner) who’s
only there for his girlfriend (Bang), and Fredericks (O’Connor), who’s been
there for a while after being unable to ‘terminate’ and end his cleanse. The
group is mentored by Lily (an on-form Anjelica Huston), who makes a hilarious,
screaming entrance.

The retreat is based on the ‘master
cleanse’ from which the film takes its name – a diet of lemon, syrup and pepper
juice designed to allegedly cleanse your body of toxins. In the film, the
cleanse is the mastermind of Ken Roberts (Platt), a cult leader-like figure who
communicates to the group mainly by way of self-help tapes.  The impurities the group purge manifest
themselves in a more literal way than anyone imagined, and that’s where the
film takes on a more sinister yet comical theme. The film is enjoyable, funny
and sad at times. Galecki does more than enough to make you warm to his tragic
character, although he is nearly upstaged by a particular ‘character’.

The film could have easily fallen flat,
straying into B movie or comedy territory, but it’s a masterful blend of
horror, drama and comedy.

THE MASTER CLEANSE / DIRECTOR & SCREENPLAY: BOBBY MILLER / STARRING: JOHNNY GALECKI, ANNA FRIEL, OLIVER PLATT, ANJELICA HUSTON 
 

Virginia (Cardinali) is travelling through
the countryside with her daughter Rebeca (Duranda), who she has kidnapped from
her estranged husband. She gets a flat tyre and a kind stranger (Ferro) helps
her, warning her not to stay in the area for too long. Later, at a petrol
station, Rebeca is kidnapped by a mysterious man driving a tow truck. She gives
chase, only for an ambulance to purposefully run her off the road, killing her.
A priest (Dreizik), somehow connected to the kidnapping, gives her a Christian
burial. She is then brought back to life for eight hours, guided by the
stranger from earlier who tells her to save her daughter she has to find ‘the
white coffin’. The only problem is, she’s up against two other women with the
same predicament, and a demonic sect determined for her to fail.

Watching White Coffin is a surreal
experience. Part of it reminds you of 1970s European horror, and part of it
feels like you’ve just woken up to a strange soap opera on your hotel room TV
in a foreign country.  One thing brutally
refreshing about it is kids can actually die – and in horrible ways – and you
realise that there’s no holds barred in this film. You have a fast-paced race
against time scenario, interspersed with a circular saw wielding maniac (another
‘70s throwback) and the odd gallon of blood. There’s an obvious twist at the
end, but the film is fresh and unique and likely to become a cult classic.

WHITE COFFIN / DIRECTOR: DANIEL DE LA VEGA / SCREENPLAY: ADRIAN GARCIA BOGLIANO, RAMIRO GARCIA BOGLIANO / STARRING: JULIETA CARDINALI, RAFAEL FERRO, ELEONORA WEXLER, DAMIAN DREIZIK

 

Rebellious teenager Ricky is placed in a foster home with a middle-aged couple consisting of welcoming Bella and grouchy Hector. A series of unfortunate events results in Ricky and Hector having to survive both the wilderness of the New Zealand bush and each other’s company, and a series of misunderstandings mean they have to forever stay on the run, leading to a national manhunt to track them down.

Hunt For the Wilderpeople is directed by Taika Waititi, who most recently gave us the superlative black comedy What We Do in the Shadows. Being more of a family film it doesn’t have the same undercurrent of darkness as the vampire mockumentary, but it still finds time for several quite emotionally poignant moments amidst its flowing stream of inappropriate humour. Neither does it ignore the dangers inherent in wilderness survival, and several moments highlight how easy it is to become fatally lost within the vast untamed forest, each presented in a (mostly) comical fashion.

Despite Ricky and Hector’s mutual antagonism and constant bickering, a mutual respect gradually grows between the pair, although not in the artificially uplifting way of Hollywood equivalents but more grounded in reality, which is kind of ironic given the comical improbability of much of the rest of the film. It takes a certain kind of twisted mind to successfully write jokes about the accidental implication of child molestation. The humour at times pushes the limits of plausibility, but never so far as to tip over the edge and descend into farce.

The driving force of the film, Sam Neill and Julian Dennison constantly spark off each other, and the latter should also be noted as one of the most engaging child actors to have emerged in recent years. Ricky’s brash confidence is endearing rather than annoying, and with the harsh life he has led up to this point and his attempts to pre-emptively mythologise the gangsta life he thinks he wants for himself, you can truly appreciate what pushed him towards the kind of person he is turning into. Other memorable characters include Ricky’s social services officer Paula whose attempts to present herself with an artificial degree of intensity only highlights how inept she is at her job, and a survivalist nutter who calls himself Psycho Sam and hopes other people will too.

On paper the film might sound like little more than a standard feel-good movie, but the throwaway banality of such a description does a disservice to what a thoroughly entertaining ride it is. Part coming of age tale, part chase movie, part mismatched buddy comedy and part survival thriller – while at the same time not really definable as any of these – Hunt For the Wilderpeople is funny, moving, enthralling and exciting, and impossible to not be drawn into.

HUNT FOR THE WILDERPEOPLE / CERT: 12A / DIRECTOR & SCREENPLAY: TAIKA WAITITI / STARRING: SAM NEILL, JULIAN DENNISON, RACHEL HOUSE, RIMA TE WIATA, TIOREORE NGATAI-MELBOURNE, OSCAR KIGHTLEY / RELEASE DATE: SEPTEMBER 16TH

Expecting Rating: 7 out of 10

Actual Rating: