Review Category: DVD/Blu Ray

REVIEW: FRAU IM MOND / CERT: U / DIRECTOR: FRITZ LANG / SCREENPLAY: FRITZ LANG / STARRING: WILLY FRITSCH, GERDA MAURUS, KLAUS POHL / RELEASE DATE: AUGUST 25TH

Anyone who knows their sci-fi history will know Metropolis, Fritz Lang’s genre-defining dystopian epic. They may be less familiar with Frau im Mond, or Woman in the Moon, released just two years later in 1929, though it too deserves consideration by the genre’s historians – it was the first movie to take space travel seriously.

After the scientific community ridicules Professor Manfeldt’s theories of gold on the moon, his friend Helius determines to prove him right. The opening act is certainly the weakest, as Lang takes his time with a drawn-out espionage plot – as Helius gathers his motley crew, including his colleague Windegger and Windegger’s fiancée Friede, a shady business syndicate threaten and manipulate him into letting their agent Turner on board. It’s over an hour in before we finally get to see the rocket, but from this point on, the film ramps up the excitement.

In a time when Germany was keen on the idea of one day going to the moon, Lang put a lot of effort into getting the details right, employing real rocket scientist Hermann Oberth as a scientific advisor and even funding Oberth’s experiments alongside the film. Sure, not everything’s perfect – they crack open a brandy to celebrate having survived blast-off and wear chunky cardigans instead of spacesuits, but, with the dangers of G-force and the first on-screen countdown to lift-off, it’s an amazingly accurate depiction of space travel compared to what you might expect from the silent era.

Once they reach the moon, however, any accuracy is flushed down the space toilet. Professor Manfeldt discovers a breathable atmosphere and bounds off, Wallace and Gromit-style, albeit in search of gold rather than cheese. By this point, though, tensions have risen among the group, and the characters’ story is engaging enough for these errors to be forgiveable. As Windegger panics and tries to turn the rocket back, Turner puts his evil plans into action. And of course, there’s a love story at the heart of it all – Helius’ real reason for initially not wanting Windegger and his fiancée to join him was his repressed love for Friede, and soon they must deal with the possibility that not all of them will make it back to Earth…

Frau im Mond, though not a patch on the revolutionary Metropolis, is a fascinating piece of cinema history, with a stunning depiction of space travel, impressive set design, and a strong character story, all demonstrating Lang’s artistry as a master of visual cinema. Combined with the superb crispness of this Blu-ray release and the intriguing fifteen-minute documentary that comes packaged with it (analysing the film’s place within real-life rocket science), it’s a purchase necessary for any classic sci-fi aficionado.

Extras: Featurette / Booklet

 

 

REVIEW: ACCEL WORLD – PART 2 / CERT: 15 / DIRECTOR: VARIOUS / SCREENPLAY: VARIOUS / STARRING: ERIK KIMERER, KIRA BUCKLAND, LUCIEN DODGE, MICHELLE T HSEIH, AMANDA C MILLER, SARAH WILLIAMS / RELEASE DATE: OUT NOW

You’d have thought that Part 2 of Accel World would carry on where Part 1 left off, with Kuroyukihime and her allies battling for increasing dominance of the Accelerated World and their progress to supremacy revealing more about the multi-faceted dreamscape along the way. Sadly, we get nothing of the sort, and are instead subjected to a laborious and overextended story, driven by that most rancid of stale plot devices: blackmail.

Noumi is a Burst Linker and pubescent sociopath who frames Haru by hiding a camera in the girls’ changing rooms and then threatens to reveal fabricated evidence of him doing so and thus destroy what little respect he has, unless he regularly gives up his Burst Points. In a country as obsessed with propriety and social standing as Japan is, perhaps the scenario seems a lot more plausible, but to Western sensibilities it appears as just another tedious example of characters acting in certain ways for no other reason that the plot demands it.

A pantomime villain we’re expected to take seriously, Noumi talks in smug condescension and childish spite, making him irritating rather than threatening, and does little more than go on and on and on and on about how superior he is and how pathetic everyone else is and blah, blah, blah, as if it were manipulative genius that allowed him to orchestrate events rather him simply being a prick. He’s the kind of annoying antagonist who benefits from the protagonists’ mistakes, and is thus not required to actually do anything to remain in control.

At the midway point the story is interrupted by a couple of side episodes featuring Kuroyukihime on a school trip, where she encounters a group of local Burst Linkers and reveals a somewhat sapphic friendship with a classmate, which other than mild titillation serve absolutely no purpose. They’re even introduced by an introductory voiceover from Haru saying it’s a story he will never know about, highlighting their utter pointlessness. Aside from this, her only real contribution to proceedings is a Big Damn Heroes appearance near the series’ end, which is one of the only truly satisfying moments in the entirety of the dozen episodes.

At one point, it briefly looks like events are about to develop into the plotline that was promised at the end of Part 1, but despite the fact its introduction would have resolved this story and begun another one umpteen times more interesting, it’s interrupted after only a few moments and then never even mentioned again. When it takes half of an entire series to play out a narrative that could have easily been done with in three episodes, you can’t help but wonder how much effort the makers of the show are actually putting into it.

After such a great start, it’s really disappointing to see the quality of the show drop so sharply one disc to the next. If Accel World is granted another series, it desperately needs to pick up the pace again. Quickly.

Extras: Trailers

 

 

REVIEW: ALMOST HUMAN / CERT: 18 / DIRECTOR: JOE BEGOS / SCREENPLAY: JOE BEGOS / STARRING: GRAHAM SKIPPER, JOSH ETHIER, VANESSA LEIGH / RELEASE DATE: AUGUST 4^TH

Joe Begos’ debut feature film is a lovingly made and knowing homage to the glorious excesses of ’80s horror. At a humble 76 minutes, Almost Human is filtered through the nostalgic haze of a childhood spent watching horror films and reading Stephen King novels.

Like the infamous lights over Phoenix in 1997, Almost Human opens with a statement of authenticity, which in film terms, of course, means it’s all made up. It opens with Josh Ethier (who also edits and co-produces) getting whisked away in a flash of light, to a chorus of a nose-bleed inducing noise. It’s a simple enough plot that proves alien abduction is still fascinating and ripe for the picking.

Begos doesn’t skimp on the gore front and the effects are especially good, with the axe-cam being a particularly gruesome treat. In fact, there’s video nasty-levels of mayhem and lashings of blood to boot, loaded with Re-Animator-style black humour.

That’s not to say it’s all bite and no bark, it taps into the idea of pod people, explored in Invasion of the Body Snatchers and The Thing, which, in the ’50s, brought a nation’s fear of communism to the silver screen. While the commie threat isn’t a modern concern, the idea of an alien entity walking around as your next door neighbour is a chilling one.

The film is perpetually fuzzy, like a thrice-copied videotape, adding to the idea that you’re watching a lost ’80s gem. Shrugging the film off as unoriginal is to miss the point entirely. Instead, it fills a void for good old fashioned horror: bloody, funny and creepy. Oh, and be sure and wait until after the credits.

Extras: FrightFest Q&A

 

DVD REVIEW: ALIEN ABDUCTION / CERT: 15 / DIRECTOR: MATTY BECKERMAN / SCREENPLAY: ROBERT LEWIS / STARRING: KATHERINE SIGISMUND, COREY EID, RILEY POLANSKI, JILLIAN CLARE, JEFF BOWSER / RELEASE DATE: AUGUST 25TH

Hallelujah and praise the Gods of straight-to-DVD movies. Here’s something we thought we’d never seen again in our lifetime – a tense and inventive found-footage movie which belies its lurid title to deliver some effective, economical visuals, a few scares and a real ‘didn’t see that coming’ twist ending. Movie miracles can happen, it appears.

With its loose basis on real-life events – the ‘Brown Mountain lights’ phenomenon of North Carolina and the United States Air Forces’ Project Blue Book investigation into UFOs – Alien Abduction introduces us to the Morris family, vacationing in the Brown Mountain woods. Fortunately everything they say and do is being recorded by the family’s autistic son Riley (Polanski) and the film at least tries to rationalise his obsession with filming everything, no matter how terrifying, by depicting it as his way of coping and communicating with the world. Credulity is inevitably strained but our scepticism is soon swept away by the usual found-footage mantra of ‘Oh my God, oh my God’ as the first weird thing happens in the middle of the night.

And to be fair to Alien Abduction, much of it actually is pretty weird. The film quickly puts the Morris clan into jeopardy; brights light illuminate the night, dead crows rain from the sky and most creepily, they find a tunnel full of abandoned cars, amongst which stalk mysterious inhuman creatures. The family flee deep into the woods and encounter a dubious grumpy gun-happy redneck, all the time pursued by fleetingly seen creatures. It seems there’s no escape; before long the family are trapped, the blinding lights of some thunderous alien machine flooding through the cracks in the walls and ceilings. It’s eerie and it’s unsettling because of what we don’t see rather than what we do and it becomes gripping and unnerving enough for us to briefly forget that this nightmare is being scrupulously filmed by an 11-year-old boy who would in reality, have dropped his camera and run for the hills screaming at the top of his voice hours earlier.

The film punches way above its weight the last few minutes. Abductees are lifted into the air in beams of lights, their backs casually broken, before they’re swept up into some sort of machine in which terrible experiments are conducted. Riley’s still filming until the aliens decide that enough’s enough and chuck his camera out of their ship and it spins back down to Earth where it’s found and collected by the USAF. As the credits roll there’s one last twist in the tale which is genuinely worth sticking around for.

Alien Abduction is surprisingly solid stuff, a breath of fresh air in the stale found-footage world. The script gets the job done; the acting’s no better than it needs to be, but the film drips atmosphere and delivers moments of genuine unease as the Morris family come to terms with the fact that they’re dealing with something way outside the sphere of human experience. Their terror is real, it’s palpable and it’s believable. Even if you’re bored witless by found-footage films by now – and who could blame you? – Alien Abduction gives the genre a much needed shot in the arm and comes surprisingly highly recommended.

DVD REVIEW: A NEW YORK WINTER’S TALE / CERT: 12A / DIRECTOR: AKIVA GOLDSMAN / SCREENPLAY: AKIVA GOLDSMAN / STARRING: COLIN FARRELL, JESSICA BROWN FINDLAY, RUSSELL CROWE, JENNIFER CONNELLY / RELEASE DATE: AUGUST 18TH

“What if once upon a time there were no stars in the sky at all… what if they aren’t what we think at all? What if they come from our wings as we turn into angels?” is the first line of A New York Winter’s Tale. Fuck me, that’s terrible, isn’t it? But it’s OK, lots of films stumble on the opening voiceover, I’m sure it’ll get better… oh, the monologue’s continuing with some tedious bullshit about the miracle in all of us. It’s fine, we’ll have some actual dialogue soon and surely it’ll improve. I mean, imagine if every second line in the whole damn film exhibited the same awfully po-faced seriousness. But that wouldn’t happen, right? Oh.

There really isn’t a lot to recommend in Akiva Goldsman’s ridiculously failed attempt at mimicking Neil Gaiman. Colin Farrell, a thief with a fabulous 1910s-style emo fringe, is on the run alongside his inexplicably flying horse (who also has a fabulous fringe) when he falls in love at first sight with some girl from Downton Abbey and packs in thievery to mope over her. The problem is, she’s dying of tuberculosis and needs to be kept in chilly environments, Victor Freeze-style. Cue love story with worse romantic dialogue than Attack of the Clones, the lowlight being “Give me a chance and you’ll melt all the snow in the world”, somehow simultaneously turning both her terminal illness and a potential climate change catastrophe into a chat-up line.

There’s also a bit set in 2014, in which Farrell is still young and active. Why? She made him love her so much that he didn’t die. No, really. That’s it. That’s actually in the actual film.

Adversity comes in the cracked face of Russell Crowe, who makes a half-assed attempt at playing a mob boss demon out to catch Farrell for reasons I can’t be bothered to remember. Maybe you and your mates can entertain yourselves for five minutes with a game of ‘guess which accent Russell’s trying to do’.

The one thing that does score Winter’s Tale some points is Will Smith’s absurdly weird cameo as the Devil. Not because it’s at all good, but I’m not sure it’s terrible either, it just… is. It defies explanation. If you watch it and understand what you just watched, and why, you’re a cleverer person than me. I wanted him to come back, just so I could maybe understand and learn something about myself in the process.

That surreal transcendental experience aside, A New York Winter’s Tale is a big steaming pile of magic flying horse shit. With an utterly muddled plot and dialogue that would make Tommy Wiseau cringe, the only real miracle in this film is when it ends.

Extras: Featurette

DVD REVIEW: ASHENS AND THE QUEST FOR THE GAMECHILD / CERT: PG / DIRECTOR: RIYAD BARMANIA / SCREENPLAY: STUART ASHEN, RIYAD BARMANIA / STARRING: STUART ASHEN, WARWICK DAVIS, ROBERT LLEWELLYN, VICTORIA BROOM, DAN TOMLINSON, CHRIS KENDALL, CHRIS BINGHAM, MILLIE REEVES, SULE RIMI / RELEASE DATE: OUT NOW

Stuart Ashen is best known for his YouTube videos in which he sarcastically reviews tat on his brown sofa under the cunning pseudonym Ashens, though you may also know him through his sketch comedy. Ashens and the Quest for the GameChild is a humorous science fiction caper that casts this unlikely celebrity as an Indiana Jones-like seeker of pointless artefacts, specifically the Gamechild which in this movie is a super rare handheld games console. In reality, it is a rather worthless bit of tat, that’s the joke.

For those unfamiliar with the Ashens channel, this is a deeply silly and laugh-out-loud screwball comedy, filled with pop culture references and some rather strange characters. Those in the cult of Ashens will recognise the likes of rubbish corporate mascot Chef Excellence and camp villain The Silver Skull. The feature manages to squeeze these things in without confusing the uninitiated; a chap in a silver mask and nylon moustache playing a synthesiser is going to be funny regardless of context after all. Though at times it feels like a series of skits stitched together with a very broad plot, it’s the performance of both Mr Ashen and his sidekick, played by the excellent Dan Tomlinson, that keeps it all together. Highlights include an animated sequence by Oli Putland and a theme song by Harry Partridge, a surprise appearance by Warwick Davies and a suitably silly performance from Red Dwarf’’s Robert Llewellyn.

If all of this sounds familiar, be aware that Ashens and the Quest for the GameChild is a remastered version of the movie that was launched on YouTube, with the original production costs met through crowd-funding and multi-platform firm Channel Flip. Every penny spent can be seen on the screen and for a small-budget flick, the result is pretty fantastic. The movie will also stay available (for free) on the internet, though the DVD/Blu-ray features upgraded sound and picture quality and a few extra bits (mostly jokes) have been added. They’ve also stuffed the disc full of very silly extras. The art gallery tour is particularly daft and filled with Ashens’ trademark sarcasm. Over all, this a great little movie that could well be the start of a new wave of British comedy.

Extras: Behind the Scenes / Life Through a Lens / Rob Llewellyn Interview / Stormtrooper Costume Tour / GameChild Commercial / Art Gallery Tour / Outtakes / Character Profiles / Trailer / Deleted Scenes / Director and Actor Commentary

DVD REVIEW: THE BUNNYMAN MASSACRE / CERT: 18 / DIRECTOR: CARL LINDBERGH / SCREENPLAY: CARL LINDBERGH / STARRINNG: DAVID SCOTT, JOSHUA LANG, JULIANNE DOWLER, MARSHALL HILTON / RELEASED: OUT NOW

In case you weren’t aware, this is a sequel to 2011’s Bunnyman, also from Lindbergh. Based on the legend/urban myth of the Bunnyman – a man in a bunny suit that apparently scared the piss out of people several decades ago – the best way to describe the titular character (Lang) is as Leatherface in an Easter Bunny outfit. Whereas Michael Myers has Haddonfield, Jason Voorhees has Camp Crystal Lake, and Freddy Krueger has Elm Street, the Bunnyman is housed in a ghost town in the deep south of the USA. For any poor soul who that comes across his or brother Joe’s (Scott) path, things don’t end well.

Linbergh’s mission for this film was to take on the concerns from the first movie (let’s just say it didn’t fare well with critics or genre fans) and right those wrongs second time out. Thing is, there are just so many flaws. Firstly, the continuity goes down a wayward path from the opening gambit, and then the film is simply riddled with clichés, bad dialogue and largely hokey acting. That’s all well and good for certain films, but The Bunnyman Massacre portrays itself as a serious horror film. Even more worryingly, the biggest concern is the hopping mad killer at the centre of this (rabbit’s) tale.

In all our years of watching horrors, even the worst of them, we’re hard pressed to think of a central killer who is so unscary. Yes, he does some dastardly deeds and the film has an impressive body count, but there is just nothing sinister about a man in a head-to-toe (minus boots) rabbit costume regardless of what heinous acts he commits. The marketing around the film bangs the drum that Bunnyman is the next horror icon. No. Just… no. Sadly Bunnyman simply relies on stealing horror icons’ gimmicks; he hears voices, like Michael in Rob Zombie’s Halloween films; there’s a ‘body in a sleeping bag’ scene that’s pulled straight from Jason X; and there are soundbites, plus chainsaw, that seem directly pulled from The Texas Chain Saw Massacre.

The Bunnyman Massacre isn’t all bad, once you get past it’s killer. David Scott is impressively engaging as Joe; a backwards redneck with a love of homemade jerky. Similarly, David Marshall does well, if not underutilised, as a tough and worn local sheriff. As the film progresses, there are some interesting moral dilemmas for the heroines of the piece, but it’s all too late to stop the film really standing out from the low-budget horror pack. For a film that does have some decent moments, it’s just a shame that its central rabbit lacks any sort of sinister kick.

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DVD REVIEW: MUMFIE’S QUEST / CERT: U / DIRECTOR: JOHN LAURENCE COLLINS / SCREENPLAY: BRITT ALLCROFT  / STARRING: PATRICK BREEN / RELEASE DATE: OUT NOW

Thomas and Friends creator, Britt Allcroft, has introduced many children to the unending pleasures of anthropomorphisation and the powers of friendship. In many ways his ’90s series, The Magic Adventures of Mumfie, had far more to say about friendship, and boasted a wackier menagerie of characters than Thomas ever did. While it hasn’t dated gracefully, Lionsgate has made it available on DVD in the UK for the first time. A few extras wouldn’t have gone amiss, though.

Mumfie’s Quest is comprised of 13 of Allcroft’s 10-minute episodes, trussed together to form a drawn out hour and forty-three minutes. Film and TV are different mediums, ‘nuff said, and it’s obvious that Mumfie’s Quest is more a series of vignettes than anything resembling a film. The plot takes unnecessary tangents, given its supposed film status, making the undersea sequences all but redundant.

The traditional animation is lovely, though basic. Presenting Mumfie, a well-mannered, inquisitive white elephant hungry for adventure and, like Bilbo Baggins’ unexpected journey, has adventure thrust upon him. Mumfie is hardly the oddest of his company, not with Pinky the flying pig, Napoleon the down-on-his-luck French raven or, most bizarrely, Whale who’s kitted out inside like a swanky hotel lobby. With a gaggle of Monty Python-inspired voices over Lewis Carroll-style escapades, the kids will certainly enjoy it (even on a diet of CG animation).

While the songs get tedious, they are heartfelt, the best being when the sea pirates break out, and the plot is sickly-sweet at times but never without charm and a bucket load of cute to boot. It may not quite have the depth, majesty or sophistication of Eastern animated movies, but Mumfie’s Quest is definitely a worthy English answer to any of Miyazaki’s films.

REVIEW: APOCALYPTIC / CERT: 18 / DIRECTOR: GLENN TRIGGS / SCREENPLAY: GLENN TRIGGS / STARRING: JANE ELIZABETH BARRY, GEOFF PINFIELD / RELEASE DATE: JULY 28TH

The found footage subgenre is often a cheap, easy and cynical way to generate scares. Since the mind-boggling success of 1999’s The Blair Witch Project, there has been a slew of imitations, crowding an already overstuffed niche. Glenn Triggs’ Australian horror Apocalyptic has done more to rejuvenate the found footage subgenre than any other film post-2000.

The film opens with documentary journalist Jodie, and Kevin, her camera man, attending an AA meeting where the pair catch wind of a backwoods cult. The duo go to investigate what appears to be a harmless enough commune led by a bloke who claims he’s god reborn enacting out a prophecy. Things inevitably turn sinister.

There’s strong performances from both Jane Elizabeth Barry and Geoff Pinfield as Jodie and Kevin respectively, and the supporting cast do a great job, but it’s David Macrae who gives a show -tealing turn as cult leader Michael Godson (see what they did there?), a demented spiritual leader; part Charles Manson, part Hannibal Lecter.

American film and TV is somewhat preoccupied with the Manson family, and cults are nothing new within the genre, but in an Australian context it really offers something fresh, creepy and effective. Apocalyptic, however, has more in common with Jim Jones’ infamous suicide cult than the Tate murders.

Like The Wicker Man, the film is concerned with esoteric spiritual values versus Christianity, not as explicit, but it’s there, bubbling under the surface. Kevin’s light relief offers moments of respite that make this a complex and three-dimensional piece of storytelling, which never seems to take sides.

Coming in at well under 90 minutes, Apocalyptic doesn’t take a huge time investment, but it’s a demanding film nevertheless. A lot of the best horror is, at its heart, simple and Apocalyptic is stripped back but no less effective. It builds up to an utterly harrowing ending as ambiguous as it is unflinching. There have been many Blair Witch imitations but Apocalyptic may just have done one better.

Extras: Making of / Director’s commentary / Trailers

REVIEW: ENEMIES CLOSER / CERT: 15 / DIRECTOR: PETER HYAMS / SCREENPLAY: ERIC BROMBERG, JAMES BROMBERG / STARRING: JEAN-CLAUDE VAN DAMME, TOM EVERETT SCOTT, ORLANDO JONES, LINZEY COCKER / RELEASE DATE: JULY 21ST

This latest straight-to-home-release JCVD-starrer is a fun, if predictable, actioner that sees the ‘Muscles from Brussels’ teaming up once more with director Hyams (Timecop, Sudden Death). Early on, we’re introduced to Henry (Scott), a former Navy SEAL turned Forest Ranger who seeks isolation in a forest located on the US/Canadian border. What Henry doesn’t realise is that Clay (Jones) is set to turn up at his door with revenge on his mind for his brother’s death; a brother who died on duty whilst under the leadership of Henry back in the day. With the two at odds, they must work together to fight the crazed menace of Xander (Van Damme), a French-Canadian vegan who happens to be heading up a drug cartel in search of some lost cargo that went down near to the peaceful, idyllic forest. Yes, after his scene-stealing turn in The Expendables 2, JCVD is one again playing the bad guy.

Enemies Closer may be a film that is firmly aimed at fans of ’80s action movies, but from the opening moments of JCVD taking down a group of guys by simply using various computer accessories (all that’s missing is a USB drive shoved up someone’s arse), you can’t help but be drawn in by Hyams movie. Make no mistake, it’s riddled with cheesy dialogue, some massively over-the-top brawls, and one-liners that would make Arnold Schwarzenegger’s Mr Freeze proud (“Put the kayak down”; “You make one wrong move, you’re gonna have a new asshole”) Central to the film is another staple of ’80s cinema: angsty partners. Scott and Jones’ characters, despite some clear differences and bickering, have to team up to take down Van Damme. Reminiscent of the Roddy Piper/Keith David dynamic from They Live, the two are just as happy cracking wise as they are with having a slapstick fight involving tins of soup and irons.

Of course, Van Damme is the flagship name here, and he delivers a brilliantlY loony performance, making you wonder why it took so long for him to turn to the dark side after all these years. Don’t be expecting the serious, hand-shacking, baby-kissing good guy who throws out a quip or two – this Van Damme hams it up something rotten, producing an erratic villain who, in the blink of an eye, goes from talking about carbon footprints to ramming a branch through somebody’s windpipe. Meanwhile, Jones is decent, although it’s hard to really buy into Dead Man on Campus and An American Werewolf in Paris’ Scott as an action-type of guy.

At a running time of just over 100 minutes, Enemies Closer is breezy, enjoyable fun that’s not to be taken too seriously. Predictable, yes, but it’s worth a watch just to see Van Damme’s crazed hairdo.

Extras: A Closer Look – Making of Enemies Closer / Audio commentary with Peter Hyams