Review Category: DVD/Blu Ray

REVIEW: CAMP DREAD / CERT: 18 / DIRECTOR: HARRISON SMITH / SCREENPLAY: HARRISON SMITH / STARRING: ERIC ROBERTS, DANIELLE HARRIS / RELEASE DATE: OUT NOW

Eric Roberts stars in Camp Dread, a summer camp-set (in case you hadn’t guessed from the title) slasher film about an aged horror director who ships a group of awful youngsters off to star in his reality show cum horror reboot. If this were the nineties, we’d be calling it postmodern. Alas, Camp Dread is too dated even for that. Post-postmodern isn’t a thing yet, so we’re stuck with this desperately uncool dinosaur of a slasher feature, for the time being. 

Roberts and modern Scream Queen Danielle Harris (the best of today’s bunch, by this reviewer’s reckoning) headline Camp Dread, but neither are around for long. Roberts appears once every ten minutes or so, smugly sneering from behind a laptop screen, while Harris’s screen time amounts to little more than a glorified cameo as the town sheriff. 

Front and centre are the game’s contestants, a terrible gang of reprobates who spend most of their time either having sex, trying to have sex, Twittering or overusing the word ‘douchebag’. With its abundance of laptops, mobile phones and, um, digital picture frames (an actual plot point, believe it or not), Camp Dread is like spending your evening with a classroom full of naughty teenagers who won’t put down their phones for long enough to have so much as one measly conversation. It’s fine to acknowledge that this modern technology exists, but too many horror films fail to integrate the stuff into their stories without it seeming annoying, facile and stupid. Just like Camp Dread’s characters, for that matter.

As the film begins bumping off its characters, one by one, it does become slightly more bearable. Its Giallo-esque, old school death sequences are gratifyingly gory and vicious, with one early eyeball gag being particularly effective. The ever-reliable Roberts gives good sleaze, being one of the few actors capable of looking slimy even while wearing glasses. He could do with more screen time, but at least he gets more to do than most actors in such low-budget, straight to DVD movies (we’re looking at you, Danny Trejo).

In spite of Eric Roberts, Danielle Harris and a couple of other minor redeeming factors, Camp Dread is, ultimately, quite dread-ful.

Extras: None

REVIEW: THE DELTA FORCE / CERT: 15 / DIRECTOR: MENAHEM GOLAN / SCREENPLAY: MENAHEM GOLAN, JAMES BRUNER / STARRING: CHUCK NORRIS, LEE MARVIN, MARTIN BALSAM / RELEASE DATE: MAY 5TH

Lee Marvin and manly mean machine Chuck Norris star in Arrow Video’s latest B-movie release, The Delta Force, a loud, silly but very enjoyable ’80s actioner. If it were made today, The Delta Force would literally be The Expendables, its men-on-a-mission action taking in hijackings, gunfights and Chuck Norris repeatedly smacking people in the face.

When a packed flight is hijacked by a pair of terrorists, the Delta Force is called to action. Led by Lee Marvin (in his last screen role), the elite squaddies must find a way to rescue the hostages before it’s too late. Here we see two very different styles of warfare at work – Marvin and his sneaky Metal Gear Solid skulking around versus Chuck Norris kicking people in the head and driving around in plain sight on a missile-launching motorbike. Both are effective, but it’s Norris in his heyday that everyone came to see.

The Delta Force is notable in that where most action films give their star a villain of similar physique to face up against, this one really doesn’t. A key action scene has Norris beating the snot out of a man who never stood a chance, slapping him around like a rag doll and generally punching the poor man to a pulp. You’d feel sorry for him, but he is, well, a terrorist. The film’s action sequences are accompanied by a bombastic, victorious soundtrack which makes it seem cheesy but no less enjoyable.

This Chuck Norris action film may seem like an odd release from cult cinema merchants Arrow, but its odd tone and over-the-top action set-pieces actually make it a perfect fit for their sensibilities. There’s even an unexpected sense of pathos, particularly during scenes in which the airline’s German stewardess is forced to pick out Jewish passengers for the terrorists to torment. In this day and age, films about aeroplane hijacking and terrorists will always leave a sour taste in the mouth, but Delta Force, in spite of its age, is well-handled and less inflammatory than it could have been. No, we never expected to use the word ‘pathos’ in a review of a Chuck Norris picture either.

The Blu-ray gives you the film in all-new high definition, in addition to the usual Arrow add-ons and finishing touches. There’s a refreshing lack of Chuck Norris jokes in the film’s featurettes, although screenwriter James Bruner does talk about working with Chuck in Chuck Norris Scribe. It’s well packaged and informative, if a little dry.

If The Delta Force doesn’t quite achieve ‘elite’ status, its sheer bombast helps to cover the gaps – mostly by having Chuck Norris punching terrorist scum right through them.

Extras: Featurette on Cannon Films / Interview with James Bruner / Interview with original Delta Force instructor

REVIEW: THE GHOSTKEEPERS / CERT: TBC / DIRECTOR: ANTHONY D. P. MANN / SCREENPLAY: ANTHONY D.P. MANN / STARRING: CHRISTIAN PAWLOWSKI, JENNIFER VERARDI, ANTHONY D.P MANN, SHERRI PATERSON / RELEASE DATE: TBC

While it’s difficult to imagine this micro-budget, Canadian shot-on-video effort being embraced by general audiences – or even the horror community at large – on its UK release, it is at least a brave attempt to fly in the face of modern genre extremes with a subtly chilling ghost story.

Young Barry Bird (Pawlowski) lives the fanboy dream by renting Marlowe House, the location of his favourite horror flick, bringing in two of the film’s stars and a medium for a retrospective podcast. Before long old secrets are revealed and the group become aware of a restless spirit in their midst.

Well, um, that’s about it really, but director Mann does manage to elicit a few creepy moments along the way. The film is heavily reliant on dialogue, which, while reasonably well written, has a tendency to over explain everything to the point that it isn’t all that scary anymore. Easily the best thing about it is Mann himself, in an entertaining turn as horror has-been Victor Brimstone. With his erudite English tones and Hammer-esque gait, he’s believable and convincing as the former star, even if he doesn’t seem quite old enough to have been making movies back in the ’80s when The House Where Evil Was Born (boasting ‘a Tangerine Dream score and a direct-to-video budget’) was supposedly unleashed on the world. In fact, the acting from all concerned is the film’s greatest asset.

Sadly, however, the problem is that, whichever way you cut it, films shot on video just look and sound horrible. Few will have the patience to actually get to any of the good stuff after they see the abominable high-end home video look and hear the dreadful video-recorded sound acoustics. Which is a shame really as it masks the artistry that Mann is obviously capable of. If you do stick it out, then you’ll be rewarded with some haunting images, particularly in the flashbacks to the heart of the mystery near the end. But you’ll still spend most of the time wishing that you were actually watching the fictional movie that the characters are talking about.

As patronising as this may sound, it’s hard not to admire Mann for giving this a go with such scant resources at his disposal. It would be interesting to see what he could do with more of a budget behind him.  

Extras: Trailers

REVIEW: ANNA – SCREAM QUEEN KILLER / CERT: 15 / DIRECTOR: MELANIE DENHOLME, THE AQUINAS / SCREENPLAY:  MELANIE DENHOLME, THE AQUINAS / STARRING: MELANIE DENHOLME / RELEASE DATE: OUT NOW

Anna: Scream Queen Killer takes us on a journey into the world of indie grindhouse film auditions with a twist. So says the blurb. Actually what we have here is a tawdry little movie based on a single wafer-thin idea that would have been better as a short film. Even then, it probably would have had little appeal.

Melanie Denholme is the eponymous actress, Anna, taking part in a series of filmed auditions with a sleazy casting director who coerces her into increasingly convoluted and sexualised scenarios until our heroine finally snaps and exacts revenge on said sicko. “She’s had enough”, cries the poster tagline. After five minutes of this film, so will you.

It’s not that the acting is poor in Anna: Scream Queen Killer, indeed Denholme shows some ability – when she gets to do more than just take off her clothes – but the problem is that the whole thing reeks of desperation. Denholme and co-director The Aquinas try hard to create a succès de scandale a la The Bunny Game but they fail miserably. Basically what you have is 74 minutes of low-budget voyeurism and not much else as Anna endures various humiliating scenarios (why?), with no attempt to engage the viewer on any other level than that. Self-indulgent or what? And the scenario itself is such a cliché that it quickly becomes dull.

Shame, as Denholme shows promise. It is slightly disturbing that she would herself be willing to endure the humiliation of making this film, presumably in a bid for the limelight. Or perhaps there is an element of therapy for her in it: the distributor of the film Chemical Burns claims that the scenario explored in Anna: Scream Queen Killer is one many actresses would recognise in the industry.

Let’s hope not.

Extras: None

REVIEW: NARUTO SHIPPŪDEN – THE MOVIE 4 – THE LOST TOWER / CERT: 12 / DIRECTOR: MASAHIKO MURATA / SCREENPLAY: VARIOUS / STARRING: JUNKO TEKEUCHI, TOSHIYUKI MORIKAWA / RELEASE DATE: OUT NOW

Unable to tell a story contributing to the overall Naruto continuity, The Lost Tower relies on time travel to create a compelling narrative, but ultimately disappoints with a generic and unmemorable plot.

I first started reading Masashi Kishimoto’s Naruto manga series in 2003, and watching subtitled versions of the anime not long after. As a massive fan of both, I feel pretty well qualified to say that Naruto Shippūden: The Lost Tower is neither a great movie nor a great Naruto story. I gave up on Naruto movies years ago, after the catastrophically underwhelming first feature adventure, Naruto the Movie: Ninja Clash in the Land of Snow. I hoped that six films later things might have improved, but sadly this wasn’t the case.

The biggest problem with the Naruto movies is that because the main plotline is still ongoing, the movies seemingly aren’t allowed to introduce any plot elements that will last beyond the duration of the movie. Where great storytellers could work within these constraints to create dazzling standalone creations, the Naruto movies are formulaic, repetitive and worst of all, make promises that they don’t deliver.

The Lost Tower‘s main selling point is that Naruto travels back in time and fights alongside a young Kakashi, Minato and Shino and Choji’s father. Ninety minutes should be enough to fill these characters with life and create compelling character arcs, but they’re mostly only present for the fight scenes, and even then sparingly.

The best Naruto story arcs soar above the traditional limitations of battle manga by speaking about perseverance in the face of adversity, the ties of friendship, and the complex motivations of a brilliantly realized cast of characters. The worst, like the anime filler arcs and (from my limited experience) the movies, beat you over the head with Naruto’s inspirational optimism and ability to overcome every situation, coupled with an over-reliance on repetitive fighting.

The quality of animation in The Lost Tower is high throughout, the new Queen Sara is likeable and well-drawn, and the backdrops and settings are all impressive, but overall this was another wasted opportunity. It can’t tarnish my love for a series that I’ve been following for a third of my life, but it also hasn’t encouraged me to watch any of the films that I missed.

Extras: None

REVIEW: ALEISTER CROWLEY – LEGEND OF THE BEAST / CERT: TBC / DIRECTOR: DOM LENOIR / SCREENPLAY: DOM LENOIR / STARRING: HENRY AMPHLETT, ELLE BLACK, CLAIRE BOWEN / RELEASE DATE: TBC

If there was ever a subject crying out for the biopic treatment, then surely it’s ‘The Great Beast’, Aleister Crowley. Dubbed ‘The Wickedest Man in the World’ by the British press, our most famous occultist was a visionary, outsider, poet and occasional horror novelist, accomplished mountaineer, posthumous counterculture icon, and all-round rum bugger. There has been the odd attempt to turn his life into a movie in the past, but none have been really of note and certainly in no way definitive. Is Legend of the Beast what we’ve all been waiting for?

Sadly this amateurish micro-budget production doesn’t even come close. From his deathbed, a fairly healthy-looking ‘old Crowley’ relates the story of his life in monotonous tones that sound as though they’re being read from cue cards. Eventually the clumsily handled, over-explainy opening leads into what seem like Crimewatch re-enactments of episodes in his earlier life, where ‘Young Crowley’ is played by a gentleman (Amphlett) who looks or sounds not even remotely like him. Surely the fact that Crowley went to Cambridge in the late nineteenth century should offer up at least some clues as to the man’s accent and general demeanour.

Similarly, even given the obvious budgetary constraints, one should surely expect some effort to keep this stuff true to its period. Your local am dram group could make a better fist of this, or at least ensure that all their male characters don’t wear shirts and trousers that look as if they come from Top Shop. Each anecdote is handled in a terminally boring fashion, with huge swathes of dialogue that one can’t imagine ever being issued forth in a real conversation. And what makes this worse is the fact that what they are saying is on the whole intrinsically interesting – or would be, if presented in the right way.

The makers have at least attempted to give this shot-on-video film a cinematic look, enlivened slightly by some location work, and post-syncing has avoided the usually horrible acoustics that mar these things, although some of the female characters’ voices are frankly hilarious. On the whole, what we are left with is a film that would no doubt garner a respectable mark on a university film production course, but is several light years shy of being fit for commercial release.

If you’re intrigued by the life and times of one of the most interesting figures of western esotericism, just read a book about him instead. Because Crowley himself would be the first to tell you that life really is too short for this. We guarantee the movie in your head will be better.

Extras: Trailers

REVIEW: THE INVOKING / CERT: 15 / DIRECTOR: JEREMY BERG / SCREENPLAY: JEREMY BERG, JOHN PORTANOVA, MATT MEDISCH / STARRING: TRIN MILLER, BRANDON ANTHONY, ANDY NORRIS, D’ANGELO MIDILI / RELEASE DATE: MAY 12TH

What do you call a horror film which isn’t a horror film? Answer: The Invoking. Maybe not the best joke you’ve heard this year but then The Invoking really is nothing to laugh about. Unfortunately it’s also nothing to get scared about, which is a bit of a problem when your audience are expecting something which might at least be trying to tingle the spine a little. But here’s where nervy PR and a shaky faith in your own product backfires; retitled from the original Sader Ridge into the much more lurid The Invoking, this is actually a decent and watchable psychological thriller which has been sold down the river by being falsely marketed as a horror movie. The DVD’s detailed ‘making of’ feature (which is actually more watchable than the movie itself) reveals that the movie’s budget was so tiny that it wasn’t possible to even plan, much less realise, any of the expected jump-shocks and scares of the traditional horror movie. Quite why everyone is so keen to label the film a horror movie when it really isn’t is anyone’s guess…

Still, The Invoking isn’t big or clever enough for it to really matter all that much. What it lacks in horror and gore it makes up for with a fairly neat idea, an atmospheric and suitably remote location (the producer’s childhood home) and some enthusiastic and gutsy performances. Sam Harris (Miller) inherits some real estate (including, if you will, the proverbial ‘cabin in the woods’) and sets off with some friends to check out her new acquisition. Creepy groundskeeper Eddie (Midili) tells Sam that she and her family spent time at the property when she was young but she can remember nothing of it. Or can she? She hears whispered voices, disembodied praying, experiences violent waking nightmares. It seems that the house is exhuming memories best left buried and as Sam becomes increasingly paranoid, none of her friends are safe…

There are no monsters or mutants here, no creatures from the subconscious, no escaped psychopathic lunatics – just a young girl whose long-repressed memories of family abuse and brutality are bubbling to the surface and tipping her over the edge of sanity and into psychosis. It’s an interesting idea and a decent character study,  it intriguingly substitutes expected stalk-and-slash clichés with moments of tension and mounting dread and a real sense that something is not right here even if the story fails to unfold in the way we might expect from having seen far too many movies featuring isolated teenagers stranded in the middle of nowhere. The Invoking is a worthwhile, if flawed, attempt to do something a bit different but it’s been done no favours by its distributors’ desperate attempt to pigeonhole it as something it very clearly isn’t and was never really intended to be.

Extras: Commentaries / ‘Making of’ feature / Galleries

REVIEW: SISTERS / CERT: 15 / DIRECTOR: BRIAN DE PALMA / SCREENPLAY: BRIAN DE PALMA, LOUISA ROSE / STARRING: MARGOT KIDDER, JENNIFER SALT, CHARLES DURNING / RELEASE DATE: OUT NOW

When a man meets a beautiful young model as part of a hidden-camera gameshow (Peeping Toms, which would be hosted by Keith Lemon or Paddy McGuinness if it were produced today) he’d be forgiven for thinking that his luck is in. Even more so when she invites him to spend the night with her. Sure, there’s the matter of her obsessive ex-husband and nervous (heard but unseen) sister to contend with, but that’s a fair price to pay for Margot Kidder in her prime.

Kidder isn’t the only one in fine fettle, with director Brian De Palma bringing a great sense of energy to the film. De Palma has been oft dismissed as a Hitchcock imitator, and, indeed, the cinematic icon’s influence is well felt throughout Sisters. Many of Hitch’s tricks are replicated here, from visual tics to storytelling techniques, as well as one Psycho-esque twist. That said, it works just fine as a Hitchcock homage, and its story is interesting enough to stand on its own merits.

A precursor to De Palma’s more famous films, it is occasionally a little too derivative (most twists can be worked out well in advance) but makes up for that with its story, directorial flair and entertaining performances. Kidder’s attempt at a French accent is utterly dire, but it’s hard to dislike her. Lisle Wilson is sympathetic as the nice young man unwittingly caught up in the sisters’ mess, while Jennifer Salt is fine as reporter Grace. None of them can seem to pronounce the name ‘Danielle’ right, but the occasionally shonky acting is all part of the cult charm.

As we’ve become accustomed to by now with Arrow, the film is lovingly presented in all-new High Definition with an accompanying DVD for those without Blu-ray capabilities. The package also includes some fantastic cover artwork, a collector’s booklet and informative documentary detailing De Palma’s cinematic exploits. It’s worth it for the reversible sleeve, which has creepy bug-eyed William Finley staring out at you from the case.

Sisters isn’t up there with the likes of Carrie or Blow Out, but it is one of the director’s most interesting films. Blackly funny, energetic and surreal, it’s a wonderful cult oddity from a cinematic master of the odd.

Extras: Two video essays / Interviews with Jennifer Salt, Louisa Rose and Paul Hirsch

REVIEW: PUMPKINHEAD II – BLOOD WINGS / CERT: 18 / DIRECTOR: JEFF BURR / SCREENPLAY: VARIOUS / STARRING: ANDREW ROBINSON, AMI DOLENZ, SOLEIL MOON FRYE / RELEASE DATE: OUT NOW

Pumpkinhead was the directorial debut for make-up and special effects guru Stan Winston; he even penned the story himself. It starred Lance Henriksen and his peculiar brand of stripped-back acting. It was an atmospheric and moody monster revenge movie that wasn’t half bad. Pumpkinhead was, and remains, an underrated screen monster, even if it is just a xenomorph knock off. The squash-headed 1993 sequel, however, has none of these attributes.

It conjures the cheap aesthetic of the video nasty, but minus the bite or attitude. It’s an amateurish affair from director Jeff Burr (responsible for the Texas Chainsaw Massacre 3 and a few additions to the Puppet Master franchise, among others), who has seen far too many Wes Craven movies.

The only standout performance is from Andrew Robinson and that’s simply because he’s that bloke from Hellraiser. The film is full of thoroughly unlikeable characters who stand around telling each other plot points.

The effects and make-up are sadly lacking, which, given Winston’s reputation and deft touch on the first outing, is a shame. It’s a surprise the audio-visual stays in sync (mostly), though, when you take into account the uninspired score, perhaps that’s not a plus. A power ballad does close the credits, after all.

Still, there’s nothing quite like a bad low-budget horror to make you loony with laughter, and it should appeal to fans of movies of the so-bad-they’re-good variety.

Extras: None

REVIEW: THE PHANTOM OF THE OPERA (1989) / CERT: 15 / DIRECTOR: DWIGHT H. LITTLE / SCREENPLAY: DUKE SANDEFUR / STARRING: ROBERT ENGLUND, JILL SCHOELEN, ALEX HYDE-WHITE, BILL NIGHY / RELEASE DATE: OUT NOW

The oft-filmed Gaston Leroux novel, tarnished by the Andrew Lloyd Webber musical, gets a full-blooded makeover thanks to this forgotten late ’80s version.

In a deviation from the original story, Erik Destler (Englund) is a composer, so obsessed with having his work heard forever that he strikes a deal with the Devil. Unfortunately, the price for this pact is he is horribly mutilated, forcing him to live in the shadows, deep under a Victorian London opera house. He becomes infatuated with a young understudy, Christine (Schoelen), tutoring her (unseen through a dressing room mirror) and doing everything he can for her to land the lead role in the latest production of Faust. Be this killing off the leading lady, critics, stage hands or anyone else who gets in the way.

Despite lapsing into slasher territory at times, this is actually a rather sincere re-tread of the classic text. Sure, some elements have been changed and there are few ‘Freddy-esque’ quips from Englund early on, but for the most part it works well. Erik’s scarred face is often hidden under layers of grafted human skin, a procedure he does himself in sickening close-up. Wearing this skin-mask he almost resembles a psychotic Barry Manilow, but don’t worry, that’s not the only horror to be found here. The murders are suitably gory, albeit very brief. The film is bookended in modern-day New York, when aspiring singer Christine discovers the ragged pages of Erik’s score, before being knocked unconscious by a falling sandbag at an audition. We can assume what follows is a dream of sorts, but the transition is not too jarring, even taking into account some dodgy English accents (they must be easier than trying to do French, as the original story takes place in Paris).

Accents aside, the acting’s solid, and it’s lavishly directed by Little (who recently helmed an episode of From Dusk till Dawn: The Series), providing adequate tension and some creepy atmosphere in the dank sewers and underground labyrinth of Erik’s home.

This newly-released Blu-ray looks fine, if not spectacular, but certainly better than all previous formats, but is a bare-bones disc.

Extras: None