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Angry Joe Quinn from Dexter, Faith the Vampire Slayer and their very pretty young friends take a Wrong Turn and find themselves lost and stranded in the creepy woodlands of West Virginia USA. There they are attacked by deformed cannibals and horribly slaughtered, one by one. So began one of my favourite horror franchises of all time. No, really.

Big praise for a series which has spent most of its time residing in DVD bargain bins everywhere. Beyond the first, reasonably popular Wrong Turn, the rest of the entries in the series have stayed well away from the big screen. It should have rightfully died with Wrong Turn 2, the first of its straight to DVD sequels, but then a curious thing happened – people reacted positively to its crude splatterpunk aesthetic, and a cult favourite was born. Beyond all odds, we’re now on the fifth Wrong Turn. The franchise shows no sign of dying anytime soon.

“Ssh. You can’t say that sort of thing around here.”

Even the filmmakers know they’re taking the piss now. “Another Wrong Turn?” one character says to another in Wrong Turn 5. Yes, another, and it delivers everything you’d expect from a Wrong Turn film at this point, only with added Doug Bradley (Pinhead!). At this point, most self-respecting fans of film will be begging for the series to just go away already. The franchise, with every entry, gets cheaper, nastier and has less and less artistic merit. As a horror fanatic, I should hate Wrong Turn and its exploitative, cash-grab attitude to horror. But there’s a certain je ne sais quoi about the series that I just can’t not love. Except for that one with Tamar Hassan. That was truly bad. Well, badder than usual.

The first Wrong Turn is a genuinely acceptable backwoods slasher movie which horror-hounds can admit to liking without fear of reprisal. Desmond Harrington and Eliza Dushku are engaging leads, the former showing a lot of promise, the latter delivering a strong performance as the strong yet vulnerable Jessie. The story is fast paced and fun, the kills gory and inventive. The late, great Stan Winston’s make-up effects for his deformed Hillbillies look great. They’re a properly imposing set of slasher movie villains. Coming at the end of an era in which horror was silly and ironic (the post-Scream effect) Wrong Turn was a refreshing throwback; a cheap, nasty Deliverance for kids. It’s no classic, but it is immensely watchable. Jeremy Sisto, Lindy Booth and Emmanuelle Chriqui make for very sympathetic victims (also the other one, killed while taking a pee). With an explosive finale and plenty of action, Wrong Turn is a gem in the overpopulated but rich backwoods slasher subgenre – by no mean coincidence, my favourite subgenre.

Its immediate sequel is an entirely different beast. It opens with American Idol finalist Kimberly Caldwell (no idea) speeding her swanky sports car down a lonely West Virginian road. There she is intercepted by the cannibalistic locals and literally sliced in two, like a sausage. This sequel did not inherit its predecessor’s sense of grit and seriousness, then. Filming a reality TV show in the woods, contestants and film crew alike are beset by the angry cannibals. What these Leatherface wannabes don’t anticipate, however, is Henry Rollins being there to put a stop to their nonsense. Rollins is a pretty terrible actor, but his Dale Murphy is a presence to be reckoned with. His gory encounter with Three-Finger and the old gas station attendant (Wayne Robson) is a highlight. If you ignore the horrible acting and rubbish script, there’s a lot of fun to be had. It’s gory, action packed and Henry Rollins. Watching Henry Rollins turn the tables on the Hillbillies is a joy; like a really, really, really low-budget Dennis Hopper in The Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2. Huh, I can just feel my credibility dissipate with this article. Wrong Turn 2: Dead End should have been just that for the franchise, but there was more to come.

One half of Robson & Jerome had let himself go.

I can barely remember ever watching Wrong Turn 3, it’s so forgettable. Tamer Hassan is amongst a gang of prison escapees who find themselves lost in cannibal country. Also amongst the cast is hunky Eastenders chef Charles Venn and other faces you’ll probably recognise from Straight to DVD movies and TV productions everywhere. “What you don’t see will kill you,” runs the tagline. In this case, what you don’t see will vastly improve your life. The film also manages to kill off most of its human-noshing hicks, meaning that the only way the franchise could go now (apparently just giving up was not an option) was backwards.

Thankfully, Wrong Turn 4: Bloody Beginnings is a return to form. That ‘form’ is only Wrong Turn 2, but there’s little chance of you forgetting about Wrong Turn 4 anytime soon. Especially not during that fondue scene. Ew. A prequel which tells how the monstrous man-eaters came to be, Bloody Beginnings is set in a dilapidated old mental hospital in the snowy middle of nowhere, and sees the cannibals – yes, you guessed it – picking off a group of youths one by one. It’s tasteless, unpleasant and shockingly violent. I know I shouldn’t, but I really enjoyed Wrong Turn 4. It’s the horror movie equivalent of junk food. If Deliverance, Southern Comfort and The Hills Have Eyes are prime steak, Wrong Turn 2 – 5 are the equivalent of a greasy chip shop burger. You know it’s bad for you, but it tastes so good. With that in mind, you’re probably going to end up with a serious heart attack if you attempt a box set marathon (maybe swap the third instalment for something healthier, maybe a salad or The Texas Chain Saw Massacre).

Don’t expect a sudden change in tack from the second prequel, Wrong Turn 5: Bloodlines. It’s cheaper, crueller and stupider than ever. In it, the cannibal clan are adopted by local psychopath Doug Bradley. When their mentor is arrested, the Hillbillies attack the unsuspecting town and its residents, picking them off – again – one by one. There’s nothing to match the fondue scene in terms of inventiveness, but the kill sequence here is remarkably mean-spirited. As the only name actor (we’re not counting Roxanne McKee from Hollyoaks) Bradley is fun to watch. It’s a complete waste of his talents, but he does go around poking out eyes and threatening to cut off people’s “titties” like the Marquis De Sade reborn. Once more, there’s the sense of betraying one’s critical faculties as I enjoyed a movie that I knew was cynical, lazy and not all that good. But then there’s a cannibal riding a thresher over someone’s head, Three Finger feeding a girl her own intestines and the world’s most incompetent cop.

More so than Saw or Paranormal Activity, I love the Wrong Turn series. It’s frequently visceral, occasionally scary and touches on very primal fears. There’s Desmond Harrington, Eliza Dushku, Henry Rollins and Doug Bradley. Wayne Robson is perfectly cast as a gas station attendant. There’s an American Idol finalist being cut in twain. There’s Stan Winston’s monster designs, an enormous amount of blood and gore, some truly inventive kill sequences and that wonderful setting. There’s Miss Dushku as a quite perfect Damsel in Distress, Harrington as the useless hero. There’s an actor whose name is actually ‘Texas Battle’. If you like that sort of thing, there’s even Tamer Hassan. There’s one of the greatest horror movie theme songs ever in The Blackout City Kids’ Wrong Turn. “Somebody help me,” that very over the top tune goes, “I made a mistake. I think I took a wrong turn.”

I’ve a feeling that this is going to be an incredibly unpopular opinion, but I love Wrong Turn. You may not, but this is my own personal love letter. How did I come to feel so strongly about such a divisive series of films? Life choices, probably. Somewhere along the way, I think I took a wrong turn. And I’ve not looked back ever since. Long live Wrong Turn.

WRONG TURN 5: BLOODLINES is released on DVD/Blu-ray January 28th 2013. Pre-order yours by clicking on the cover below…

Mayfair’s luxurious Claridge’s Hotel has, since it was founded in 1812 as Mivart’s Hotel, played host to the great and the good of the entertainment industry and can count the likes of Cary Grant, Audrey Hepburn, Yul Brynner, Spencer Tracy, Richard Burton, Elizabeth Taylor,  Mick Jagger, Brad Pitt and Lady Gaga (not together) amongst its famous guests and Gordon (“**** off out of my kitchen”) Ramsay currently runs the hotel’s main restaurant. But December 11th 2012 saw a contingent of dwarfs, hobbitses and wizards descend upon Claridge’s swanky Ballroom – Europe’s finest press hounds in hot pursuit – for the official Press launch of The Hobbit – An Unexpected Journey, director Peter Jackson’s eagerly-anticipated return to JRR Tolkien’s Middle Earth, so unforgettably brought to life in the Lord of the Rings trilogy (2001-2003).

Starburst Magazine could hardly pass up the opportunity to mingle with the Middle-earthers and set off to Claridge’s as fast as its outsized furry feet could carry it. Softened up by delicate refreshments including tea served in bone china (and not in a chipped Dalek mug as we might be more used to), finger sandwiches and mini mince pies (well, it is nearly Christmas) the Press pack took their seats as event host, broadcaster Edith Bowman, welcomed to the stage the cast and crew of The Hobbit – An unexpected Journey. In attendance: Peter Jackson (Director, co-screenwriter), Philippa Boyens (co-screenwriter), Martin Freeman (Bilbo Baggins), Sir Ian McKellan (Gandalf), Richard Armitage (Thorin Oakenshield), Andy Serkis (Gollum), Sylvester McCoy (Radaghast the Brown), James Nesbitt (Bofur), Ken Stott (Balin), Aidan Turner (Kili), Mark Hadlow (Dori), Jed Brophy (Nori), John Callen (Olin), Peter Hambleton (Gloin), William Kircher (Bifur), Dean O’Gorman (Fili), Graham McTavish (Dwalin), Adam Brown (Ori), Stephen Hunter (Bombur).

Below are the highlights of a precious hour spent in the company of The Hobbit and friends…

PETER JACKSON

On finally unleashing The Hobbit for public consumption…

“It’s always exciting when a film’s about to be released because you spend two or three years making it and trying to preserve the secrets of the movie and trying to focus on getting the film made and then there’s that moment in time when suddenly you have to hand it over to the whole world – in our case to 25,000 cinemas around the world – so I’m looking forward to it. I’m extremely proud of  the movie; we’re in the entertainment business, we make these films to entertain people so it’s the whole point really, to get it out there.”

On casting Martin Freeman as Bilbo Baggins…and nearly not getting him…

“Back when we were originally thinking about The Hobbit Martin was the first person that came to mind and was the only person we ever wanted for the role but during that process – and we probably spoke to Martin about eighteen months before we started shooting – it was hard for the film to get a green light because MGM, one of the co-rights holders, was having financial issues and the studio was being sold and it wasn’t possible to proceed with the movie until that situation was resolved and we were kind of in a waiting pattern to some degree. Then during that period Sherlock arrived and by the time we could actually formally offer Martin the role the shooting of the second series of Sherlock was due to land right in the middle of The Hobbit shoot – and we were shooting for about a year-and-a-half – and I was in a state of panic I think and we couldn’t think of anyone else because unless that piece of casting is absolutely perfect you’re really jeopardising the films and jeopardising then investment in the films and the audience’s enjoyment. So I was having sleepless nights and I lay awake one night with my ipad and I’d just downloaded Sherlock and I was watching the second episode at about four o’clock in the morning sitting there watching Martin and thinking ‘God, he’d make the perfect Bilbo, what the Hell is going on, how have we ended up where we are and this is a disaster’ and then I got up in the morning and made some phone calls and basically I had the idea which was pretty audacious in the way the film industry works to shoot as much as we could and then to stop filming and let Martin go back to the UK to do the second Sherlock shoot and then continue on again with us. I asked the studio, checked in with Martin to see if he would be up for that – it was the bets phone call I ever made quite honestly!”

On the structural similarities between The Fellowship of the Ring and The Hobbit – An Unexpected Journey…

“It’s Tolkien in the sense that both stories start in the Shire in a fairly innocent way and in the case of The Hobbit Bilbo has the situation where the dwarfs invite themselves to dinner and obviously Rivendell’s part of the book because they stop there but in a way the similarities end there, the story goes in a completely different direction as the next two films proceed.”

On persuading Christopher Lee to return after his publicly expressed disappointment at being cut from the theatrical version of Return of the King…

“I’m very pleased he’s in this film. He and I are fine; he was very upset to be cut out of the theatrical cut of Return of the King but he is in the extended cut which is the one that, when people look at the three back-to- back, it’s always the extended ones they watch. It was great that we brought the White Council into the story of The Hobbit; they’re not part of the novel but Tolkien wrote a lot of additional material that he was intending to use to expand the Hobbit post-Lord of the Rings to make the two stories tie in but he never wrote that book but a lot of his notes are in the appendices of Return of the King and so the White Council which comprises Saruman and Galadriel and Gandalf and Elrond are part of his greater idea for the story. I did talk to Christopher the other day  to ask him about coming to the premier and he did say ‘Am I still in the movie?’ Thank God this time around I could say ‘yes!’”

On shooting in 3D…

“As a director I’ve always been somebody who tries to transport you from your seat into the adventure on the screen. I don’t want to treat the audience as observers to something being projected on the screen, I like a sense of involvement which is why my natural directing style involves moving the camera around a lot and using wider-angled lenses so for me 3D is just something that can enhance that experience. I think 3D technology is going to improve; certainly what needs to improve is the projection of 3D in the sense that as soon as you put the glasses on the light level drops and I know that when I  see 3D movies that’s always a frustration but hopefully there’s only a year or so to go before the laser projectors come in which is the next generation of projection which will lift the light projection up to the same level as 2D films.”

On finding time to sleep during a massive shoot like The Hobbit trilogy…

“To me you have a responsibility when you’re making a movie, you’ve got a responsibility to audiences for whom you’re trying to make a film which is worthy of the money they’re going to pay at the door when they go into the cinema, a responsibility to the studio who are giving you a lot of money and entrusting it with you to make a film for them, you’ve got a responsibility  yourself – I was an eight year-old kid in New Zealand dreaming of making movies one day and I’m doing exactly what I wanted when I was a kid – so sleeping seems like something you should do much later on. You’ve got to concentrate and get the film done first so I find it hard to take days off while we’re working on a movie to some degree – I try to because I’ve got a family, I’ve got kids so I try to balance it as much as I can – but you do feel that there’s so much responsibility on your shoulders you should be spending that time doing what you’re supposed to be doing and making the best film you can.”

On the future of filmmaking and the movie-going experience…

“I’ve been thinking about what cinema is going to be like in ten years or twenty-five years and it’s difficult to say. There is a degree of jeopardy at the moment with the film industry because with all the alternative ways that people have to see movies now, right from your home entertainment systems down to your iPhone and your ipad – I really hate the idea that I’m a director making a film for an iPad, that’s kind of depressing, I think I would go and lie on a beach in Fiji and retire if I thought I was really doing that. It is a time when cinema audiences are dwindling and I think that as an industry we have to be looking at what we can do to increase and enhance the experience of going to a cinema, making young people especially come to the cinema and I don’t think we should be thinking that the technology that we created for theatrical presentation in 1927 should be what we need to be using in 2012, I think we should be looking at the technology we have available and how we can make the experience more immersive, more magical, more spectacular because it’s not just the movie it’s the occasion of going out with friends into a dark room full of strangers and seeing this huge image on a screen with incredible picture and incredible sound and being transported into an escapist piece of entertainment, that’s what I love about cinema. It’s going to get bigger, it’s going to get sharper; if I was going to predict anything I’d say that because of those reasons I think that cinema exhibition and what we’re going to be as a society, what we’re going to respond to, is going to be larger and more immersive experiences, something like IMAX where you go in and see something that’s so huge you’re never going to be able to stick that on the wall of your lounge or hold it in your hand, it’s something that’s truly awe-inspiring as an experience. It’s not that the entire film industry needs to make those kinds of films or even screen movies in that way, the idea is that cinema has always had a variety, it’s always had film-makers making films that are special for them so there’s always something that, no matter who you are, there’s always a film that will appeal to you and variety’s important as well.”

PHILIPPA BOYENS

On returning to Middle-earth, adapting one book into three films…

“It was a process actually but in the end Pete’s always said that stories find their level and you’ve got to trust that process and we were lucky because we got to go back to a world that we loved and got to work with characters such as Andy Serkis playing Gollum and Sir Ian McKellen, returning characters that we all really loved and we knew that we were also going to introduce these other wonderful characters as well so we focussed on the characters as much as the actual story and in the end it was a lot of fun and fairly easy.”

On what J.R.R. Tolkien might make of the filmmakers’ changes to his stories…

“Professor Tolkien did say when he wrote this great mythology, of which The Hobbit is but a part, that he did hope it would have a life of its own like all great mythologies do and that other minds would be brought to it, bringing drama and music to it. I can imagine there’s a lot he’d have huge issues with but then turning it into a film wasn’t his job, that was our job. But I also suspect there’d be a lot he’d rather enjoy because you can tell he had a great sense of humour. I think he would have particularly enjoyed Sir Ian Mckellan’s Gandalf because the moment in the film I particularly love is when Bilbo says ‘I’m sorry, do I know you?’ and Ian’s response was so perfect when Gandalf says ‘I’m Gandalf, and Gandalf means me!” which was for me the coming together of a beautiful piece of writing by a great English writer with a sense of whimsy in the whole ‘good morning’ scene but delivered by one of England’s great actors.”

MARTIN FREEMAN

On getting the role of Bilbo Baggins… and nearly not getting it…

“I was rehearsing a play in London at the time and mentally I’d already said goodbye to the Hobbit, I’d had to pass – it was really dull and boring to not do it. I remember very clearly because I was going to see Benedict Cumberbatch in a play at the National Theatre and I had this very long and involved conversation with Michael, my agent, and I remember saying ‘We’re going to have to let this go, aren’t we?’ and he went ‘Yeah, I think we are, sorry’. I’ve never really been one to dwell on things, onwards and upwards and all that, but I would rather have had not to do that but later  I was rehearsing a play myself and I got a call from Michael again saying it was back on and I said ‘what do you mean?’ and he said ‘Peter’s rearranged it’ so I was amazed! Suffice to say I was extremely surprised and I took it as a huge compliment – and still do.”

On handling the rigours of jumping back and forth between the UK for Sherlock and New Zealand for The Hobbit…

“I handled it just by the glee of being able to do it really. I felt very lucky that I’d spent the last couple of weeks doing two jobs that I really adore, two very different parts, two very different Universes and in two very different parts of the world. I didn’t really get the chance to unwind, I spent 2011 being quite knackered because I was in New Zealand from January to May and then literally straight off into Sherlock and then straight back into this. It was very, very tiring but like in all things when you’re tired for the best reason, when you’re doing something you love you kind of get through it. Woe is me, I’ve got to do Sherlock and The Hobbit! I didn’t think I was going to be able to do The Hobbit so the fact that I was able to do both was fantastic.”

SIR IAN MCKELLAN

On returning to New Zealand to find the atmosphere on set more or less unchanged…

“I found it very similar. Behind the camera they all seemed to be old friends – Peter and his team, the cameramen, Rick who did my make-up, Emma who did my costume. In front of the camera there were new people but the whole tone of the film was exactly like it was before, like a very, very expensive home movie, with that sense of having fun, of knowing why you were all there and wanting to be with each other. The big improvements were in the actual buildings; most of the interiors in Lord of the Rings were filmed in an old paint factory which wasn’t heated, it wasn’t sound-proofed, it was next to an international airport – you had to do the takes in between the planes taking off which meant that every single word of Lord of the Rings as far as I was concerned was added later. This time we were in the state of the art ‘King Kong’ studios which James Cameron and Steven Spielberg queue up to use and as for lunch – it was served this time not in a flapping tent that’s threatening to blow over in windy Wellington but in an actual building! The best food I’ve ever had on any job – that’s another reason to go to New Zealand!”

On the process of working with actors playing dwarfs…

“I adore all the dwarfs, they know that. There is a special dwarf and he knows who he is… but the trouble with the dwarfs is that despite what they are in real life they have to look smaller than me on the screen and there are a number of devices to accomplish that and none of them is really congenial to acting which is about spontaneity and about looking the other actor in the eye and working with him or her. Often in these films you don’t have that necessity and sometimes, cruelly, you are not in the same space when you’re filming the same scene – there are two cameras recording me ‘large’ and the dwarf ‘smaller’ and then by film magic which I don’t understand the two pictures are put together and it’s absolutely magical when you see it but not when you’re doing it. On the first day I rather ashamed myself by grumbling to myself that this sort of filming wasn’t why I’d become an actor and I’d forgotten I was wearing a microphone so everybody including Peter heard but I was rewarded the next day with love because my little tent where I get made up inside the studio had been made up overnight; there were remnants of old Rivendell, there was fresh fruit and flowers and carpets and cushions, dancing boys and girls and I was made to feel that it was going to be all right and indeed it was and we found other ways of doing it too.”

On finding and playing Gandalf…

“The trick of it, as Michael Caine said, for the film camera, is that you don’t arrange your face you just think and the face will magically do as little or as much as is required but it’s wonderful to be able to do a scene and then, at Peter’s invitation, go and put on the 3D glasses and watch what you’ve just done because then you can see that you’ve done too much or too little, which is the advantage you don’t have in the theatre where you’re entirely reliant on other people’s reactions so you can sort of edit yourself… ooh, acting’s difficult, isn’t it really?”

On the differences between Gandalf the Grey and Gandalf the White…

“One of my favourite scenes in these four films that we’ve currently got is after Gandalf has tumbled to an apparent death after the Balrog incident (The Fellowship of the Ring) and the music swells and little Elijah yells silently and I feel the grief watching the character I play die forevermore – except he doesn’t but he comes back as the most boring man or wizard that could possibly ever be invented in a sense. He’s a driven man, his beard‘s been cut, he’s dyed his hair white, he seems to have stopped having any sort of fun in life and of course he’s got to save Middle-earth and he’s on a mission so it’s wonderful to come back to the Gandalf that people seem to think about. Gandalf the White doesn’t even wear a pointy hat!

ANDY SERKIS

On recreating Gollum for the brilliant ‘riddle in the caves‘ sequence…

“It was fantastic to come back and rekindle my relationship with Gollum and Smeagol and to get to play one of my favourite scenes that Tolkien wrote, with Martin in the cave with the ring. It was the first thing we shot in the movie so day one out of 276 was Martin and myself in Gollum’s cave kicking off that scene and the way Pete wanted to shoot it was to treat it like a piece of theatre so we basically shot that entire scene time and time again and it was just incredible to watch Martin begin to find Bilbo’s character and we just really enjoyed bouncing off each other and creating that scene.”

On directing the second unit…

“I was only really supposed to come back for two weeks to reprise the role of Gollum until a month beforehand when I got an email from Peter saying  ‘would you like to come down and direct the second unit?’ so again my time in New Zealand to complete the journey in Middle-earth suddenly grew to 200 days of shooting. I had the most incredible experience learning from one of the world’s greatest filmmakers with an amazing cast shooting beautiful New Zealand and in the company of dwarfs and it was really incredible.”

On getting into the mindset of Gollum…

“As an actor you’re always putting a part of yourself under the microscope so as Gollum/Smeagol there was an opportunity to run riot. One of the great things about this role is that he’s overcomplicated, you feel sorry for him, you feel pity for him, you hate him; when we were first working on the character for Lord of the Rings we thought it was very important to answer the question of ‘what does the ring mean to all of the characters and if the ring was given to you, how would you deal with the ring of power?’ So when we were creating the character of Gollum, he – or Sméagol – had a weak personality and wasn’t able to cope with the power of the ring but it was  important to find something very real, something that it could mean to you in this day and age and for me it was always about addiction. Gollum is entirely based on the notion of addiction, the way that the ring possesses him, makes him craven, lustful, depletes him physically and psychologically and mentally. Gollum is called Gollum because of the way he sounds, writes Tolkien, and the voice had to be bound up with that, it wasn’t just a case of coming up with a voice, it had to be based on something so it had to be something that was to do with his psychology and how we would see Gollum’s pain and how he was going to carry that pain. It was going to be in his throat so I needed to find something like an involuntary action that would spark off the physicality and the voice working together and… well, a cat coughing up furballs was the way we found into Gollum’s voice!”

SYLVESTER McCOY

On playing Radaghast the Brown…

“When Peter, Fran (Walsh, co-screenwriter) and Phillipa offered me the job they said ‘There’s a lot of shit in it.’ They said it was a shitty part and I said well, someone’s got to do it so I accepted it. For those who haven’t seen it I get very close to birds and they kind of leave deposits on me and I smell a lot. Made for me really!”

On not playing Bilbo in the original Lord of the Rings trilogy…

“I was up for the part all those years ago and, according to my agent, I got down to the last two actors, the other being the amazing Ian Holm. I was a bit miffed – you’re always a bit miffed when you don’t quite get things – but I was also delighted to be in such company but when I met Peter and Philippa and Fran later they said to me . ‘Well, maybe it’s good thing you didn’t get it because we’ve written you a rather interesting part’ and I think maybe they were right!”

KEN STOTT

On the family atmosphere on set and amongst the crew…

“They make you feel very welcome. It’s very long way away and it’s a very long time so it was with some trepidation that we went but also you’re arriving on the other side of the world when there’s no script which is a leap of faith and it’s something that is bewildering to begin with but that was dispelled as soon as we arrived; I was certainly made to feel very welcome.”

GRAHAM McTAVISH

On learning the physicality of becoming a dwarf…

“We learned dwarf movement with a wonderful man called Terry Notary and he was very keen to emphasise that dwarfs move in a very particular way and they move in a different way to humans and we spent a great deal of time working on that. The interesting part was that, despite all the work we did with dwarf movement, once we’d put the costumes on they were so very heavy it meant that we didn’t have to make any effort, we just became dwarfs. Those costumes were fantastic.”

JAMES NESBITT

On the experience of playing a dwarf and summing-up the whole experience of making The Hobbit…

“It was a dual thing for us. The Hobbit is essentially about a hobbit, a wizard and thirteen dwarfs who go on this journey and as actors we got the opportunity to go on this journey together, to grow together, to get to know each other and, like the dwarfs, to go on this journey together, to enter Peter’s Middle-earth, this vast, extraordinary world which he also somehow has the way of making very intimate. There’s a crew of hundreds of people who work on this yet we knew each other and that is no small testament to the man. It was also a lifestyle change, it wasn’t just about Middle-earth it was about taking a family away to the other side of the world for a long time and I had the daunting prospect – but then the incredibly-rewarding journey – of taking my daughters to the other side of the world where they got to be integrated into a new and rich culture, where they got to see an extraordinary change of life, where their lives have certainly been enhanced. I don’t know if the job will change my career but certainly my time there changed myself and my family’s lives.”

After an hour Edith Bowman called time on the Press conference and as the stars and crew took their leave the assorted hacks and photographers packed up their gear and set off into the chilly December afternoon air. Starburst Magazine helped itself to another couple of mini mince pies on the way out. Well, it is nearly Christmas…

The Hobbit – An Unexpected Journey opens in UK cinemas on December 13th 2012.

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Get your copy of our Tolkien special by clicking Gollum!

 





Ever since J.J. Abrams and writers Robert Orci and Alex Kurtzman announced that the villain in their new movie would be one with which fans were familiar, and that Sherlock star Benedict Cumberbatch would be playing him, speculation has been rife amongst fans as to which character he’ll be playing. 

Theories have suggested Cumberbatch will be playing practically every villain the Enterprise ever encountered. The most popular names that keep appearing are Khan (denied by Simon Pegg) and Gary Mitchell (let slip by Karl Urban). Other names bandied about include Garth of Izar, Gary Seven, and even Star Trek: Generation‘s Tolian Soran. 

So, naturally fans were a little taken aback this week when Paramount revealed the character’s name to be the less than overwhelming John Harrison. 

Harrison is not an established character in Trek lore, and this has led many to believe that either the character undergoes a name change in the film, or that it is a fake name released by Paramount’s marketing department in order to keep the character’s name secret a little longer.

 However, earlier this week, Kurtzman spoke with Trekmovie.com and, along with confirming the character’s name, revealed this interesting tidbit:

“Well without revealing too much what I can tell you is that in the same spirit as “can the Enterprise be under water? What does that mean? How are we going to justify this? How are we going to explain it?” We went back and we talked a lot about things that made us want to make the first movie in the first place as fans. And what do we feel was successful for the fans. A lot of that had to do with honoring the history — honoring the show. But we also want to come up with a way to make the stories feel fresh and unpredictable. So without revealing too much, we applied the same thinking to Harrison.”

So what does this mean? How can a non-established character by consistent with honouring Trek’s history?
 Well, I have a theory. 2009’s reboot showed us how, in the new alternate timeline, familiar characters, and even worlds can have new fates: Spock’s mother Amanda dies when Vulcan is destroyed, Pike ends up in a wheelchair as a result of his treatment by the Romulans and not from a radiation leak as he did originally, and so on. What if Abrams and co were to that, and to take an existing character’s fate, namely that of Gary Mitchell, and apply it to Cumberbatch’s John Harrison?

In the original episode, Where No Man Has Gone Before, Mitchell, an old friend of Kirk’s, is altered when the Enterprise attempts to leave the galaxy, developing god-like powers. As his powers grow, he becomes more detached from humanity, until he becomes a threat to the ship, and Kirk is forced to confront him.

Could the same fate befall John Harrison? There’s several hints been given that this could be the case:

The recently released synopsis refers to the crew of the Enterprise facing ‘unstoppable force of terror from within their own organisation’, implying the character is from Starfleet. The trailer also shows Cumberbatch in Starfleet uniform. Mitchell was an officer on the Enterprise.

The synopsis also talks of a ‘one man weapon of mass destruction’. Mitchell would definitely fit that bill. It’s also been implied that he’s close to Kirk and Spock, which, again, fits with a Gary Mitchell type character.

Cumberbatch’s voiceover in the trailer talks of Earth as being ‘your world’, implying that, either the character’s not from there, or, like Mitchell, he no longer feels part of humanity.

The fight scene in the trailer, showing Cumberbatch beating what appears to be a group of Klingons, suggest he possesses superhuman abilities. Again, this could fit in with a Mitchell type character.

The name John Harrison isn’t as exotic as those normally associated with Star Trek villains, but then neither is Gary Mitchell.

The scenes of destruction shown in the trailer don’t show any ships attacking Earth. Mitchell would have been able to inflict this level of damage without the use of technology.

The trailer shows what appears to be a memorial service. Could this be for Harrison, presumed dead and then resurrected? Early reports on the IMAX preview footage however suggest Harrison may already have powers at the opening of the film, which may discount this one, unless the memorial scene is a flashback?

There’s also the question of Alice Eve’s character…

During production she’s been speculated, like Cumberbatch to play a number of characters, primarily either Janice Rand or Christine Chapel. However, Comingsoon.net say they’ve confirmed she’s actually playing Carol Marcus, the scientist who, in the primary universe, invents the Genesis device, and, more importantly, is the mother of Kirk’s son David.

However, her look in the trailer is remarkably similar to that of Elizabeth Dehner, another character from Where No Man Has Gone Before. In the episode, Dehner also develops god-like powers and helps Kirk defeat Mitchell. Could Eve’s character be an amalgamation of the two, a love interest of Kirk’s who develops similar characteristics to Harrison?

Like I said, this is just a theory, but it would seem fit the available facts. Knowing the notoriously secretive Abrams, it could well be May before we find out much more.

Trailer #1

STAR TREK INTO DARKNESS will open in cinemas on May 17th 2013.

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Find your local Starburst Magazine stockist HERE, or buy direct from us HERE. Our issues are also available as fully interactive iPad editions, loaded with multimedia, and can be downloaded via Apple HERE.

We hope you’ve been saving your pennies because today is Wednesday and you know what that means: New Comic Book Day! This week’s offerings feature a handful of Bats, a Joker at his worst, a few hungry Hollows, morally ambiguous mutants on the lam, and a Battle Royale for a new generation. 

Batgirl #15

Story by: Gail Simone / Art by: Ed Benes

From DC Comics: A “DEATH OF THE FAMILY” tie-in! With so many funerals planned, The Joker decides it’s time for a wedding! Barbara’s first confrontation with The Joker since he shot her is coming to a horrifying conclusion!

Batman #15

Story by: Scott Snyder / Art by: Greg Capullo

From DC Comics: “DEATH OF THE FAMILY” continues here! The Joker’s attacks have taken their toll on Batman and his allies, and now they have to face the impossible. The final madness of The Joker’s plan revealed here! Why is he more dangerous now than ever before? Plus: In the backup feature, witness The Joker’s confrontation with the Riddler as the horror of The Joker’s plan is revealed.

The Hollows #1

Story by: Chris Ryall / Art by: Sam Keith 

From IDW: An all-new series from the creator of The Maxx and the co-creator of Zombies vs Robots! Sam Kieth and Chris Ryall transport you to a near-future Japan, where burned-out husks-the Hollows-wantonly devour souls throughout the city. Far above, a segment of society lives safely in giant tree-cities, but the problems below have a way of growing out of control

The Crow: Skinning the Wolves #1

Story by: James O’Barr / Art by: Jim Terry

From IDW: James O’Barr returns to The Crow! In part one of this special three-part tale, “Returning from a Journey,” O’Barr and artist Jim Terry craft a harrowing tale set in a concentration camp in 1945 Europe. The night train is being unloaded. And one of the passengers is making a return visit…

Change #1

Story by: Ales Kot / Art by: Morgan Jeske

From Image Comics: A foul-mouthed struggling screenwriter who moonlights as a car thief. An obscenely wealthy rapper completely disconnected from the real world. A dying cosmonaut on his way back to Earth. Los Angeles is being toyed with by destructive forces that repeatedly find the city through time and swallow it whole, and those three are the only people able to save it – if they survive the fanatics who live in the hills, National Security Agency agents, and the horrors that lurk in the Pacific Ocean.

Revival, Volume 1: You’re Among Friends TP

Story by: Tim Seeley / Art by: Mike Norton and Mark Englert

From Image Comics: For one day in rural central Wisconsin, the dead came back to life. Now it’s up to Officer Dana Cypress to deal with the media scrutiny, religious zealots, and government quarantine that has come with them. In a town where the living have to learn to deal with those who are supposed to be dead, Officer Cypress must solve a brutal murder, and everyone, alive or undead, is a suspect. The sell-out hit series created by NYT Bestselling author TIM SEELEY and Eisner winning artist MIKE NORTON is collected with bonus material!

Cable and X-Force #1

Story by: Dennis Hopeless / Art by: Salvador Larroca 

From Marvel: Cable is back! NOW! with a new X-Force at his side, he must tackle the threats that nobody else can know about. But just who are Cable’s new recruits, and why is his team public enemy number one? Caught red-handed at the scene of a terrorist attack on a major American corporation whose CEO has expressed anti-mutant views, the X-Force is the run, with none other than the Uncanny Avengers in hot pursuit.

Avengers Arena #1

Story by: Dennis Hopeless / Art by: Kev Walker 

From Marvel: Trapped on an isolated island, 16 superhuman young adults (including cult faves like members of the Runaways, The Avengers Academy and Darkhawk) are given a chilling ultimatum by their demented captor: Fight or die…only one will walk out alive! Thus begins a primal battle that will test the skills, stamina and morals of each combatant there. Welcome to Murder World, where the secrets are plenty, alliances are fleeting, and the key to victory might be rewriting the rules of the game. Who will survive? The rising star team of Dennis Hopeless (X-MEN: SEASON ONE) and Kev Walker (THUNDERBOLTS) dare you to tune in to your new favorite comic NOW!

Rejoice, loyal Starburst readers, for New Comic Book Day is upon us once more, but you better start scouring the couch cushions for loose change because there are a slew of essential titles coming out this week. From 20th century American icons to an ancient Hindu deity, this week’s new releases bring you the very best in the Big 2 and creator-owned work.

Avengers #1

 

Story by: Jonathan Hickman / Art by: Jerome Opena

From Marvel: The greatest heroes in comics together on one unbeatable team! Now shipping twice a month, the Avengers “go large,” expanding their roster and their sphere of influence to a global and even interplanetary level. When Captain America puts out his call – who will answer? Big threats, big ideas, big idealism – these are the Avengers NOW!

Hawkeye #5

Story by: Matt Fraction / Art by: Javier Pulido

From Marvel: THE TAPE CONCLUDES! Someone has a deadly secret will change the course of Hawkeye’s relationship with the Avengers.

Amazing Spider-Man #699

Story by: Dan Slott / Art by: Humberto Ramos

From Marvel: This is the MUST READ issue that turns over all the cards and reveals secrets that have been set as far back as ENDS OF THE EARTH, SPIDER-ISLAND, and 99 issues ago in ASM #600! Doctor Octopus has hours left to live. He knows Peter Parker’s secret. He has no master plan—all he wants is vengeance. Which members of Spider-Man’s rogues gallery will heed Ock’s call to arms? Special appearances by the Lizard, the Spider-Slayer, Morbius the Living Vampire, and some surprising Spidey Foes!

Thunderbolts #1

Story by: Daniel Way / Art by: Steve Dillon

From Marvel: Red Hulk, Venom, Elektra, Deadpool, the Punisher. Forget the courts, the jails, the system — this team of Thunderbolts fights fire with fire, targeting the most dangerous and lethal players in the Marvel Universe with extreme prejudice. Led by General “Thunderbolt” Ross, AKA the Red Hulk, this hand-picked team of like-minded operatives is going to make the world a better place… by all means necessary.

Action Comics #15

Story by: Grant Morrison / Art by: Brad Walker, Rags Morales, Andrew Hennessy, Mark Propst

From DC Comics: Superman is on trial for his life – and the jury is the Anti-Superman Army! It’s the ultimate villains springing the ultimate trap at the end of time itself! And the mystery that has built since issue #1 is resolved as the Little Man’s true identity is revealed – with grave consequences! Plus, in the backup feature: A crucial piece of information is revealed!

Before Watchmen: Minutemen #5

Story and Art by: Darwyn Cooke

From DC Comics: “Why is mommy crying, Uncle Hollis? And don’t miss the latest chapter of the “Crimson Corsair” backup feature from writer/artist JOHN HIGGINS!

Hellboy in Hell #1

Story and Art by: Mike Mignola

From Dark Horse Comics: After saving the world in The Storm and The Fury, but sacrificing himself and Great Britain, Hellboy is dead, cast into Hell, where he finds many familiar faces, and a throne that awaits him. Mike Mignola returns to draw Hellboy’s ongoing story for the first time since Conqueror Worm. It’s a story only Mignola could tell, as more of Hellboy’s secrets are at last revealed, in the most bizarre depiction of Hell you’ve ever seen.

Legend of Luther Strode #1

Story by: Justin Jordan / Art by: Tradd Moore

From Image Comics: Luther Strode lives. Five years after losing everything, Luther has become more than a nightmare for the evil men in his city… he has become a legend. But somebody is hunting the bogeyman, and he has dangerous allies that Luther will never expect. Luther Strode lives; but for how long?

Cyber Force #2

Story by: Marc Silvestri & Matt Merhoff / Art by: Khoi Pham & Sunny Gho

From Image Comics: For the first time in history, mankind is outpacing evolution. It takes nature thousands of years to adapt to changes and the things humanity has accomplished technologically in just the past 100 years has thrown its ability to evolve, and in turn survive, completely out of whack. In other words, a world full of wonders and conveniences is being created that none will hope to survive. This dilemma is at the heart of what CYBER FORCE is all about.  The massive corporation CDI continues to engineer technologically enhanced humans. Cyber Force, terrorists or resistance fighters depending on your point of view, try and regroup and reveal the conspiracy that is behind the heart of CDI and its mission. Aphrodite V and Stryker make their debut!

Krishna: A Journey Within

Story and Art by: Abhishek Singh

From Image Comics: A searing, human portrayal of Krishna, the god of all gods awaits you in A JOURNEY WITHIN.  Journey along through his pastimes that have swayed the ages. The final confrontation between the fire of man’s consuming greed to conquer all, and the supreme power of the Divine Spirit.

Six years after the Wii took the world by storm, Nintendo have returned with their newest console, the Wii U. 

Given the Wii U’s statistics (it’s apparently twice as powerful as the Xbox 360) there’s a lot of debate about whether this is the start of a new generation of consoles or just an adaptation of existing tech to see us through until Sony and Microsoft reveal their latest offerings sometime in 2013 (presumably, anyway. It can’t be too far away now). While it’s certainly an interesting discussion (and one I’d happily spend hours on if you want to drop us a line), a much more important thing to look at is this: is the Wii U actually any good?

The main selling point of the Wii U is the Game Pad, which is basically a massive touchscreen surrounded by control sticks and buttons. The touchscreen is used in conjunction with your TV – in some cases the same picture might be displayed on both screens, but at other times you might have the game playing on your TV and the touchscreen might be used for accessing your map or your inventory or whatever. Seasoned gamers might find this a bit of a nightmare to begin with, because it feels really unnatural for the first few hours. You’ll find your eyes being drawn away from the TV so you’re solely using the Game Pad, and you constantly have to remind yourself that if you just look up a bit you’ll be able to see what you’re doing and won’t have to squint quite so much.

The other initial drawback to the Game Pad is the placement of the buttons. It’s become standard over the last generation of consoles to have the face buttons above the right thumbstick towards the top right hand side of the controller, but Nintendo have decided to place their buttons UNDERNEATH the right stick. Even after a couple of days I’m still not sure if I’m really used to it, and I keep having to look down at the buttons to make sure I’m pressing the right one. There’s always the option of changing your controller to a standard Wiimote (if you own one), but that seems to defeat the object slightly.

Screenshot from Super Mario Bros U

On the plus side, the Game Pad is really comfortable to hold and the graphics on the touchscreen look amazing thanks to the Wii U being Nintendo’s first HD console. It’s also packed with features, including a motion sensor, built-in vibration, a headphone socket, volume switch, and a camera which can come in handy during some games but it’s hard to shake the feeling that even when the Wii U is switched off Nintendo are possibly still watching you.

One secret weapon in the Game Pad’s arsenal is that it’s possible to switch the TV off and carry on playing just using the Pad. So if you’ve got work in the morning and should really be in bed but you need to finish this level otherwise you’ll be too annoyed with yourself to be able to get to sleep, you can at least get halfway there by switching the TV off and taking the Game Pad to your room. And when you finally decide to let yourself go to sleep, switching off the power on the Game Pad will also turn the Wii U off in your living room. Quite fancy, really.

So that’s the Game Pad covered, what else have we got?

As mentioned, the Wii U is Nintendo’s first HD console and it really does make all the difference. If the Wii had looked this good, it might not have spent five of the last six years gathering dust under the TV. It certainly had enough games to keep everyone going, just with the unfortunate side-effect of looking like we’d gone back in time to the early PS2 days. It’s not an issue with the Wii U though, because it looks just as good (occasionally even better) as anything you might have played on your Xbox 360 or PS3 recently.

The usual online suspects are all here as well, including a built-in internet browser, Netflix, Youtube, and Nintendo’s eShop where you can access full games, demos, preview videos, and in time any downloadable content for Wii U titles will be available here. It certainly seems like Nintendo are having a good crack at giving Microsoft and Sony a run for their money on the “everything in one box” stakes, but there’s still a way to go yet before the Wii U catches up with all the features currently offered elsewhere.

The Miiverse is another smart innovation (although why they didn’t call it the Umiiverse is anyone’s guess) where you can access online communities and message boards to interact with other players and offer/ask for help and advice on their games. Nintendo are clearly trying to create a fun place for gamers to talk to each other, with messages appearing every now and then telling people to “play nicely” and a very welcome option to tag any comments with spoilers so as not to ruin anyone else’s game. Given time this is surely a feature that will grow to incorporate inviting other players to games and who knows what else Nintendo might have up their sleeves, but it doesn’t seem to have quite got that far just yet.

Screenshot from ZombiU

Game-wise, the Wii U has launched in Europe with 26 titles including some of the most recent blockbusters like Assassin’s Creed 3, Black Ops 2, Mass Effect 3, Arkham City, Tekken Tag Tournament 2 and Sonic All-Stars Racing Transformed. While most hardcore gamers will have already played a lot of these on whatever system they currently own, the added novelty of the Game Pad functionality might encourage some people to pick them up again. It’s the Nintendo exclusives that most people will be interested in though, the main ones being New Super Mario Bros U, ZombiU, and Nintendoland (and Monster Hunter 3 Ultimate if you’re fortunate enough to live in Japan). At roughly £50 a pop (give or take a fiver here and there), games for the Wii U are a bit more pricey than anything we’ve been used to over the last few years which is certainly going to discourage a lot of people from picking up another copy of something they’ve already played, but we can always cross our fingers for a price drop after Christmas…

So, do you need to buy a Wii U? In short, probably not at the moment. It’s a great console with plenty going for it, but so far nothing’s really had the “wow factor” that would make anyone really rave about it. If you’ve got some spare cash and feel like you’re ready for a new gaming adventure then you won’t be disappointed, but right now it’s not got that killer game or function that makes it a must-have piece of equipment. It’s telling that it’s still possible to go into town and pick a Wii U up off the shelf, when you know full well that Nintendo were hoping it would be sold out all over the place in the run-up to Christmas. Given another year to add more features, increase its game library (a couple of new “proper” Mario and Zelda games would certainly help), and drop in price a little bit, perhaps the Wii U could be the must-have console for Christmas 2013. But will they have the new Xbox and/or Playstation to contend with by then?

Whatever happens over the next 12 months, the Wii U is an interesting piece of kit and could potentially become something incredible if Nintendo are truly serious about going after the “hardcore” gamers of the world. Whether those hardcore gamers will accept it (and then keep playing once the other big boys have released their new consoles) is a question that only time can answer though. Hopefully for Nintendo, the answer will be “yes”.

Oh yeah, and a word of warning for anyone who might be picking up a Wii U for the youngsters in your family this Christmas. The console requires an online update when you first plug it in, which seems to take most people around two hours to complete. It might be worth waiting until junior’s out of the house and getting everything updated before Christmas Day, otherwise you’re going to have a very impatient child to contend with!

 

WARNING: This article contains a couple of pieces of speculation that may turn out to be spoilers. 

Next year will see Superman’s sixth trip to the big screen and it’s fair to say that the Warners new poster for Man Of Steel (below), like the teaser trailer before it, has been met with a mixed response, with a lot of fans worried about what tone the film will have and what kind of Superman we’re going to be seeing.

New Man of Steel teaser poster

It’s never wise to judge a film before it’s released, especially given how misleading marketing campaigns actually are (Dark Shadows being sold as an out and out comedy anyone?), but Warners seems to be doing very little to put Superman fans at ease. After all, in the comics, Superman is the beacon of light within the DC Universe. A symbol of hope. The world’s biggest Boy Scout (Trademark and ©Batman). None of which is coming across in any of the promotional material so far.

Sure there are reasons to be concerned; the much-maligned Zack Snyder is directing, that suit, the redesign of the S symbol, the use of the words “Grounded” and “Darker”. These are all valid causes for concern, but there are also reasons to get excited about the film. Here are my top 6 reasons we should be getting excited:

1) THE CASTING – Amy Adams is a great choice for Lois Lane (despite looking more like Lana Lang) and could finally see the first great Lois on cinema screens. Kevin Costner as Jonathan Kent is perfect (let’s hope that leaked photo of his grave is a mis-direct – as Lois & Clark and the first 5 seasons of Smallville proved, Clark needs his Pa!). Probably the most inspired bit of casting though is Laurence Fishburne as Perry White. And that’s without even mentioning Russell Crowe, Christopher Meloni, Diane Lane, Richard Schiff and Michael Shannon.

Amy Adams as Lois Lane

2) A CLEAN SLATE – One of the biggest problems with Superman Returns was its need to tie itself into the continuity of the Christopher Reeve films (well, parts 1 & 2 anyway) instead of reinventing for a new generation. Man Of Steel doesn’t have that problem, instead choosing to dump the baggage and start a fresh continuity to build a new franchise on.

3) THE START OF SOMETHING BIGGER – It has been strongly hinted that, for the first time in the cinematic DC history (barring a couple of references in Batman Forever and Batman And Robin), that this will be the start of a Marvel-esque movie universe, incorporating other characters from the DCU and leading into the Justice League film in 2015. Why it has taken this long is a mystery, given that all of its characters (unlike Marvel’s) are housed under one studio’s roof, but if they do this right we could be seeing a lot of great DC characters getting the cinematic treatment.

The Justice League (DC’s New 52) 

4) HANS ZIMMER SCORE – Sure it’s going to be strange to watch a Superman film that doesn’t open with John Williams’ famous theme, but Hans Zimmer is great choice to pick up the composers duties. If you don’t believe me, just put on his scores for Nolan’s Batman Trilogy or Inception. If he can come up with a big theme worthy of Superman then we could be in business.

5) HENRY CAVILL IS SUPERMAN – I’m one of the people who is a big fan of Brandon Routh’s Superman (arguably the best thing about Superman Returns) and was hugely disappointed that he wasn’t being given another, deserved, shot at the part (maybe he can pop up on Arrow in the part one day). I have to admit that Cavill looks good in the part, filling the suit (which I’m warming to) nicely. Also, given that he was cast as Superman when Brett Ratner was attached to (what became) Superman Returns it’s only fair that he finally get his chance in the cape. 

Henry Cavill on the set of Man of Steel

6) Its SUPERMAN! – It’s important to remember that this is a film about Clark becoming Superman and finding his place in, and being accepted by, the world around him. Kind of like the Casino Royale of Superman films, filling in the gaps between Clark leaving Smallville and arriving in Metropolis.

And besides, how can you not get excited about seeing Superman on the big screen?

Teaser #1

MAN OF STEEL opens in UK cinemas on June 14th 2013.

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Find your local Starburst Magazine stockist HERE, or buy direct from us HERE. Our issues are also available as fully interactive iPad editions, loaded with multimedia, and can be downloaded via Apple HERE.

Christopher Nolan’s Bat-trilogy closer The Dark Knight Rises has hit DVD/Blu-Ray shelves and, even as you read this, plans are under way to reboot the franchise again with a new take on Batman on film.

Rebooting Batman is nothing new. The comics have been doing it for years, switching from dark and heavy to, well, darkish and lighter. The animated series have done the same, as have the movies, and while there is no denying that Nolan’s trilogy is probably the closest we’ve had to the Batman of the comics so far, it is still a long way away from the character of the comics.

Unless DC/Warner Bros. are planning to have a couple of different big screen versions of Batman running at the same time, the smart money will be on Batman being re-introduced as part of the Justice League film in 2015 before being given his own solo film again. Now is the time to start thinking about what kind of Batman we need to see on the big screen next. After all, Christopher Nolan’s Batman trilogy is a tough act to follow.

There was an article on this very site recently that made the case for realism not belonging in comic book movies. The key thing to remember, before trying to “ground” a comic book movie, is that comic book heroes in their very origins are ridiculous, that is their appeal and that is something that should be embraced and represented respectfully in their big screen adaptations. The key to the success of any Batman reboot is going to be in embracing the ridiculousness of the character.

Now before you think I’ve completely lost my mind, let me make it clear that I’m not saying we should return to the Joel Schumacher era. Nobody above the age of 8 wants that, but Nolan’s Batman – no matter how close to the comics he is or not – is a tough act to follow and the best way to avoid the pitfalls of doing so would be to reinvent Batman’s onscreen persona and respectfully embrace his ridiculousness.

At the end of the day, what we really want to see is the comic book up there on the screen, outlandish bits and all, and there are a couple of simple things that need to be done to achieve that.

In the trailer for Batman Begins, there was a brief clip of Batman, seemingly, swinging through the streets of Gotham. This got me more excited about the film than any other bit of the trailer as I thought I was finally going to get to see the Batman of the comic, armed with just a Batarang and line, swinging through the Gotham night the way Batman does. Unfortunately when I watched the film, this turned out to be the bit where Batman is being pulled along by the train.

But how great would it be to see Batman running over rooftops, throwing out a Batarang and line and swinging out into the night? Of course this in itself is a slightly ridiculous thing in principle, but you have to admit it would look good on film. Yes, Nolan does have Batman jumping off of buildings and swinging through the night, but it’s not the same as the comics, and that’s what I want to see.

But that’s just the first, admittedly small, element of the Batman comic that needs to be realised on screen. The biggest problem for me, as a comic book fan, with Nolan’s Batman films is that there was no real sense of Batman being around long enough to really make any difference. Let’s be generous and assume there was 6 months to a year in the events between Begins and Dark Knight, Batman only fought crime for about a year/a year and a half before retiring for 8 years and then returning for a few weeks (taking out the time Bane had him locked in a cell).

We need to see Batman fighting the smaller crimes as well as the main villain of the film. And I mean standalone crimes, not crimes connected to the bigger plot of the film. Batman patrols Gotham fighting crime, let’s see that on film, rather than him just coming when the signal calls him or following up leads. By doing this you will get much more of a feeling of Batman doing more and being around for a longer period of time. Or is the criminal union in Gotham really so good that only one criminal is committing a crime at once?

We can then open the door for more of the villains from Batman’s rogue’s gallery to appear in the films and I don’t just mean by throwing them together in a forced team up. We all know that The Joker, Bane and maybe even Two-Face could carry a movie as the main villain, but The Riddler would be a great side villain instead of a films main bad guy. The Penguin would be great as a mob boss operating in the background. There could even be a place for the more over-the-top villains such as Killer Croc and maybe even Man-Bat.

With the right planning, you could even incorporate Robin back into the franchise (think a male, less foul mouthed Hit-Girl from Kick-Ass and you would be on to something) and then other members of the Bat-Family. If you plan it out like Marvel have planned out their Avengers Initiative you will then have the potential to spin it out into some great Bat spin-offs to expand on the characters and provide longevity to your franchise that could run for years in the style of the Bond franchise, but with characters that branch off into their own films.

Just leave Bat-Mite on the comic book pages!

Finally, with Batman coming back as part of the Justice League he will already be an established figure in the film, so it’s unlikely we’ll see his training, but there is always the temptation to cover it via flashback in a solo Batman film. Don’t. Nolan’s Batman Begins nailed that story and any attempt to recreate it again, no matter how you change it (and why would you?) would just draw unwanted comparisons. Let’s spend our valuable screen time giving us some Bat stuff we’ve never seen before.

So in closing, the time has come to stop trying to work out how Batman would operate in the real world (he’d be dead in a week!) and just bring his comic book world with him to the screen. Like George Clooney said during his time under the cowl; if Batman was operating in a real world city like New York, nobody would even notice him. If you do it well enough, nobody is going to care about the implausibility of what your character is doing.

Winter is coming, as the Starks do so love to remind us, and what better way to fight off the chill then to curl up with a stack of comics and a nice cup of tea? This week’s new releases feature ponies, and bat-robots, and gorillas, oh my! Toss in a few ghosts, witches, and mutants and you’ve got yourself one hell of a comic book stew. Enjoy!

Ghost #2

Story by: Kelly Sue DeConnick / Art by: Phil Noto

From Dark Horse Comics: Ghost returns to Chicago’s Resurrection Cemetery, where paranormal investigators Vaughn and Tommy first summoned her, to seek an answer to the riddle of her own identity. But digging too deeply into the past can unearth secrets that the city’s elite would rather stay buried, and soon new threats are showing their faces . . . Kelly Sue DeConnick takes us deeper into a mystery that spans two worlds!

Batman Incorporated #5

Story by: Grant Morrison / Art by: Chris Burnham

From DC Comics: War in the skies of Gotham City! Bat-robots versus Talia’s Man-Bat armies! Leviathan and The Heretic increase the hostilities to a whole new level!

Flash #14

Story by: Francis Manapul and Brian Buccellato / Art by: Francis Manapul

From DC Comics: “GORILLA WARFARE” rages on! Gorilla Grodd’s more powerful than ever, and the Flash is completely outmatched! Who will give their life defending Central City against the ape invasion?

Aquaman #14

Story by: Geoff Johns / Art by: Pete Woods

From DC Comics: In the aftermath of “THE OTHERS,” who lives? Who dies? And what is the fate of the Atlantean relics? The debut of the OCEAN MASTER!

Superman #14

Story by: Scott Lobdell / Art by: Kenneth Rocafort

From DC Comics: Following events in this month’s SUPERGIRL #14 and SUPERBOY #14! It’s their worst nightmare: A creature of unknown Kryptonian origin, more powerful than Superman, smarter than Supergirl and more lethal than Superboy. His actions will change the course of a planet’s fate!

My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic #1

Story by: Katie Cook / Art by: Andy Price

From IDW: Welcome to Ponyville, home of Twilight Sparkle, Rainbow Dash, Rarity, Fluttershy, Pinkie Pie, Applejack, and all your other favorite Ponies! Something’s not right in the town though, as some of the inhabitants are acting very, very strange! It’s up to the Mane Six to find the source of the weirdness before it’s too late! 

FF #1

Story by: Matt Fraction / Art by: Michael Allred

From Marvel: Marvel Now! shows you the future, and it’s fantastic! In the Fantastic Four’s absence, a hand-picked substitute squad—Ant-Man, Medusa, She-Hulk and Miss Thing—must guard Earth and the fledgling Future Foundation for four minutes. What could go wrong?

All New X-Men #2

Story by: Brian Michael Bendis / Art by: Stuart Immonen

From Marvel: It’s a blast from the past as the original five students of Professor X – Cyclops, Marvel Girl, Iceman, Angel and Beast – are plucked from the past and brought to the present. But what they find, the state that their future selves are in and the state of Xavier’s dream, is far from the future they dreamed of. And how will the X-Men of the present deal with their past coming crashing forward?

Thor: God of Thunder #2

Story by: Jason Aaron / Art by: Esad Ribic

From Marvel: With his past, present, and future at stake, Thor must hurry to uncover the grisly secrets behind the unfathomable horrors of the God Butcher—before it’s too late!

Witch Doctor: Mal Practice #1

Story by: Brandon Seifert / Art by: Lukas Ketner

From Image Comics: The breakout medical horror hit from ROBERT KIRKMAN’s Skybound imprint is back on call! Even the world’s leading expert in supernatural disease needs to unwind sometimes. But when Dr. Morrow wakes up with no memory of what – and who! – he did last night, is it just a case of partying too hard… or something more malignant? (Hint: It’s the malignant one!)

Be still your beating hearts because after a recent hurricane-induced hiatus, Starburst’s Noteworthy New Comics is back! This week, our picks include – but are certainly not limited to – a slew of kick-ass ladies from Asgard to Gotham, the triumphant return of Dredd, and the increasingly epic crescendo of the adventures of Spidey and Slott.

Journey into Mystery #646

Story by: Kathryn Immonen / Art by: Valerio Schiti / Covers by: Jeff Dekal and Phil Noto

From Marvel: An all-new journey begins when Kathryn Immonen and Valerio Schiti bring you… Sif: The Berzerker?! She may be a “Lady,” but girly ain’t her style! Known by many names: lover of Thor, sister of Heimdall, defender of Asgard… Sif is the ultimate faithful… sidekick?! Immortal, please. When the latest crop of beasties beset Asgard, it’s business as usual for our sword-slingin’ heroine as she leads the battle charge – but that no-holds-barred zeal for glory may be the very thing that brings the realm down around her winged helm…

Batwoman #14

Story by: J.H. Williams III and W. Haden Blackman / Art and Cover by: J.H. Williams III

From DC Comics: The Batwoman/Wonder Woman team-up epic continues! Batwoman may be out of her league as she chases down Medusa!

Catwoman #14

Story by Ann Nocenti: / Art by: Rafael Sandoval and Jordi Tarrogona / Cover by: Trevor McCarthy

From DC Comics: A Death of the Family tie-in! Catwoman is caught in The Joker’s trap as he toys with her mind. But The Joker should beware because Catwoman always comes to play!

Judge Dredd #1

Story by: Duane Swierczynski / Art by: Nelson Daniel and Paul Gulacy / Covers by: Zach Howard, Ashley Wood, Jim Starlin and Whilce Portacio

From IDW: In the 22nd century, crime runs rampant in Mega-City One, home to over 400 million citizens, robots, criminals and lunatics. The only line of defense between anarchy and chaos are… the Judges. And Judge Dredd is the toughest of them all. In this, Judge Dredd’s 35th anniversary year, IDW is proud to re-introduce Judge Dredd to America in this all-new ongoing series.

Rocketeer: Cargo of Doom #4 (of 4)

Story by: Mark Waid / Art and Cover by: Chris Samnee

From IDW: Cliff Secord, AKA, the Rocketeer, finds himself flying high over the smog-drenched skies of Los Angeles, locked in mortal combat with an ancient and terrifying creature… and then it all starts to go to Hell! Plus, the ultimate truth about Peevy’s niece is revealed! The final issue of Mark Waid and Chris Samnee’s Rocketeer series is going full throttle and the thrills show no signs of slowing down – miss this comic at your own peril!

Comeback #1

Story by: Ed Brisson / Art and Cover by: Michael Walsh

From Image Comics: Reconnect is more than a company – it’s an opportunity for good. Reconnect can reverse tragedy by sending agents into the past to rescue your mother, your wife, your brother or father or child moments before their untimely death. Mark is one of these agents. He brings the rescued from the past to the present, to a blessed reunion with their loved ones. He saves lives… or does he?

Captain America #1

Story by: Rick Remender / Art and Cover: by John Romita

From Marvel: Thrust into a bizarre, inhospitable world far from home, the all-new, high-adventure, mind-melting, tough-as-nails, sci-fi, pulp-fantasy era of Captain America is NOW! With no country and no allies, what’s left for the Sentinel of Liberty to protect? The Saga of Dimension Z begins here!

Amazing Spider-Man #698

Story by: Dan Slott and Christos Gage / Art by: Giuseppe Camuncoli / Cover by: Paolo Rivera

From Marvel: DYING WISH PRELUDE • The end of Spider-Man’s world begins when Doctor Octopus discovers who Peter Parker really is. • (Fifty years goes by much… too… fast.)

Hawkeye #4

Story by: Matt Fraction / Art by: Javier Pulido / Cover by: David Aja

From Marvel: You won’t believe what is on The Tape! S.H.I.E.L.D. recruits Clint to intercept incriminating evidence – before he becomes the most wanted man in the world. Superstar artist Javier Pulido joins Matt Fraction in a Hawkeye thriller that spans the globe… and the darkest parts of Clint Barton.

Indestructible Hulk #1

Story by: Mark Waid / Art and Cover by: Leinil Francis Yui

From Marvel: Marvel NOW! makes Hulk an Agent of S.H.I.E.L.D.! Hulk – Indestructible force, more weapon than man. Bruce Banner – smartest man alive. Combined they are the strongest, smartest weapon on the planet!