Jane Schoenbrun astounded genre fans with the release of 2021 surrealist hit We’re All Going to The World’s Fair, telling the story of Casey (Anna Cobb) who joins an occult online game. Jane’s unique blend of haunting Creepypasta stories and transgender narratives saw the film become an instant classic, with much anticipation surrounding their follow-up film, I Saw The TV Glow.

Starring Justice Smith and Brigitte Lundy-Pain, the 2024 film follows isolated teens Owen and Maddy, who bond over their obsession with a cult coming-of-age TV show, The Pink Opaque. As they grow and Maddy runs away from home, they return to tell Owen that the truth they think they know about the series and how it ended is not all it seems.

Following its wildly successful festival and cinema run ahead of its digital release on September 30th, Maddy actor Brigitte sat down with us to discuss the inspiration behind their character, the themes of identity and hope in the film’s narrative, and how Jane’s work speaks to the Queer community.

STARTBURST: You star as Maddy in I Saw the TV Glow. What attracted you to the project and how you got involved?

Brigitte Lundy-Paine: I got involved because my friend, who was one of the producers, Sam Intilli, was working with Jane. They’d decided to work together after seeing Jane’s first film [We’re All Going to the World’s Fair], and they introduced me to Jane. We met about a year and a half before we started shooting, and we got along really well. Jane sent me the script, and I loved it. It felt like we were creative soulmates, and we just had to do this.

We read that Jane deliberately took things slow with the project, allowing you both to develop a natural relationship.

Yeah, it was a long process. Jane and I would have meetings where they’d tell me about Maddy, their own Maddy, and how they envisioned the character. Then they sent me on my way to sit with the script before we’d come back together and I would do scenes for them, and they would tweak little bits of it, but that was very minimal. A lot of the collaboration happened on set. Jane is gentle and supportive, and most of our work together was technical. I remember a scene where Maddy is crying while watching The Pink Opaque, and Jane would come over and give me notes like, “Can you give more noise here? More breathing there?”

Where did you draw inspiration for Maddy?

Maddy comes from a lot of places. The later Maddy, for example, was inspired by Harry Dean Stanton in Paris, Texas. But for the earlier versions of Maddy, I was drawing from music. I listened to a lot of Cat Power, especially for the angrier teenage Maddy. I also tapped into a lot of lesbian punk, like Team Dresch. And, honestly, a lot of it came from my own deep anxiety, feelings of dissociation, and wanting to escape reality.

The film touches on some raw, emotional moments – loneliness, love, friendship, and hope. How did you prepare for these intense scenes?

I was totally immersed in the movie for a long time. I’d be saying the lines all the time. While we were shooting, I lived by myself in an attic in New Jersey, so I was very isolated and I didn’t really see anyone. I’d go to the train tracks, listen to Elliott Smith, and just be moody and emotional. I’m normally super social, but for this film, I kept to myself a lot.

I Saw the TV Glow tackles identity and how it evolves over time. As both you and Jane are non-binary creators, what was it like telling this story, especially with how it has resonated with LGBTQ+ viewers?

It’s really powerful. Even though I’m not on TikTok, friends have shown me videos of people reacting to the film and I’m really grateful to be part of that because I am also affected the same way by the film. It totally freed me as an individual who was constantly asking these binary questions. The film taught me it’s not about that at all, and it really isn’t even about your body or your physical presence. It’s just about finding the root of freedom in yourself and listening to that.

There’s a line in the film where Maddie says that sometimes The Pink Opaque feels more real than real life. Do you think there’s truth to that, especially in how we consume media?

Absolutely. I’m someone who’s so influenced by what I watch. My roommate makes fun of me because I’ll be watching The Sopranos and then make pasta every night. I’m so influenced by what I’m taking in. I just watched Daisies, the Czech film, and did the makeup the next day. I’m always, like, dipping into these immaterial realities because it feels real. I doubt my reality. Because I’m like, “What am I doing? Like, making a cup of coffee, scratching my leg. What is that?” It’s like, you want to feel alive, and so you go to there hot sources of life.

One of the key moments in the film is your monologue where Maddy explains their experience with The Pink Opaque. How did you approach that?

It was all about saying it again and again, It was a long lead-up to filming it, so I would memorise it and then say it every day. I’d say it when I was falling asleep, when I woke up, and when I was with my friend on a trip to a funeral. I also spent time getting into my body and finding the emotional resonance of it, and then saying, “fuck it” to all that.

The ending of I Saw the TV Glow has sparked a lot of debate about its meaning. How do you interpret it?

I think the ending is devastating but also incredibly motivating. It makes me want to save Owen and live for Owen. It’s really affecting. Like, when I find myself apologising, I think of Owen and those lost moments. There’s humour in it because this character has ripped open their chest and seen the glory of their true being, but they’re stumbling back into this false reality and apologising. But if you think of it as the facade completely revealed, then it actually is a really liberating ending.

How would you describe I Saw the TV Glow to someone who hasn’t seen it? It has a lot of elements and a bold style that makes it difficult to pin down.

I always say that it’s an existential horror that’s going to make you want to quit your job and destroy your life. But then it’s also about two teenagers who are obsessed with a fantasy TV show, and you can take it from there. I think there’s no way to prepare people for it because it’s a very personal and physical experience to watch the film. You just have to see it.

You mentioned the horror elements. What do you think it is about Jane’s style of horror that connects with audiences, especially now?

I think that trans people, specifically, and queer people have an understanding of the dissonance of what it’s like to force yourself into the reality that is prescribed to us. Jane’s films put that dissonance into physical sensation. There are so many attempts at making trans horror that are very surface-level and are all about physical and emotional transition, and those things are true and important too. But the reason that we are queer is because we know this deep truth and recognise these lies that we’ve been forced to swallow. And I think there’s a real relief in seeing the very honest way it is depicted by Jane.

I SAW THE TV GLOW is available to buy on digital on September 30th.