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COYOTES

Written By:

Joel Harley
Coyotes movie

Coyotes attack in this creature feature from director – and one half of the Vicious Brothers – Colin Minihan. Subject to this series of grave encounters are Scott, Liv and daughter Chloe (Justin Long, Kate Bosworth and Mila Harris). Caught between the raging wildfires outside and the pack of bloodthirsty coyotes trying to get into their Beverly Hills home, the family face a desperate fight for survival. As local sex worker Julie (Brittany Allen) points out, it’s like that film with the birds. Except with coyotes.

Featuring appropriately broad performances from reliable hams Long, Bosworth and Allen, Coyotes is an entertaining enough horror-comedy, showcasing some occasionally amusing back-and-forth and a warm sense of chemistry between the cast. It’s gratifyingly mean-spirited at times too (get yourself on doesthedogdie.com before digging in), featuring an alarmingly cruel kill before the opening credits have even begun rolling. Set against the backdrop of the LA Wildfires, the stage is set for a gruesome showdown between man and beast. Had they been able to pull off the actual killer coyotes in their killer coyote film, then we’d be in solid three-star territory here.

Unfortunately, to address the elephant in the room… well, the elephant in the room looks like it’s been generated from A.I. Quite how much (if any) was employed in making these coyotes ugly is unclear, but there’s an undeniable sheen of the uncanny valley to the whole pack – floating, shape-shifting blobs of fur which seem as though they’re about to burst at the digitally-generated seams at any given moment. Not only do they look bad, but they feel like they’ve drifted in from a different film to everyone else, hovering in to menace Justin Long for a bit before drifting back off to your mom’s Facebook feed where they belong.

Minihan and his game-for-it cast do their best with the material given, but these monstrosities drag us, kicking and screaming, not just out of the film, but the whole cinema.

COYOTES is available now on digital platforms.

stars

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