Review: TiMER (15) / Director: Jac Schaeffer / Screenplay: Jay Schaeffer / Starring: Emma Caulfield, John Patrick Amedori, Scott Holroyd / Release date: January 30th

Like it or not we live in a world of constant time pressures. Work gives us nothing but deadlines and targets to be met. There is then the added pressure to settle down, buy a house and start pumping out children like some kind of conveyor belt. Then of course there is the pressure to find ‘the one’ whomever that may be and naturally if you don’t do this before you are thirty then you are seen as some kind of social misfit.

All this is background to a 24-7 world where time is always of the essence. It’s no coincidence that dating websites have become huge business for struggling young professionals who don’t have time to waste on things like a social life. TiMER is a film that takes this world to its next logical step and whilst it never really fully explores the interesting idea at its core, it’s still a witty and entertaining romantic comedy, head and shoulders above most other rom-coms out there.

The next phase of online dating has become the ‘Timer’ a digital device implanted into your wrist that counts down to the moment when you meet ‘the one’, your soul mate with whom you will spend the rest of your life. Everybody has one attached from the time they are about 14 until they find that one special person. Things like divorce and heartbreak are a thing of the past thanks to this new system. Single orthodontist Oona (Emma Caulfield) has a timer that is blank indicating she will not meet her soul mate any time soon. Rapidly approaching thirty, Oona goes out with any man she meets and insists they get a timer just so she can confirm whether they are the one or not. One day she meets charming shop clerk/musician Mikey (John Patrick Amedori) and is taken with his affection for her as well as his easy going philosophy. This relationship breaks all of Oona’s personal rules and Mikey’s timer is set for four months’ time indicating that Oona isn’t his soul mate. Nevertheless their chemistry and feelings for each other go against every rule that the world now lives by. Things get complicated when a widower (Desmond Harrington) is brought home by Oona’s sister Steph (Michelle Borth) and Oona’s timer goes off throwing everything into doubt.

Timer shows us a believable world and for the most part this is handled quite well, sort of like a romantic comedy version of In TiMER. Sadly, like In Time, this film doesn’t really fully explore its neat central idea either. There are some indications that the timer device works via body heat but it’s never fully explained how, leaving some doubt as to the conviction of the screenwriter. There are also indications that divorce has been completely eliminated in this world by a line of dialogue from a supporting character. The impacts of this are never really mentioned as I’m sure there would be some kind of ripple effect through law firms and the celebrity gossip industry whose livelihood seems to be in the misery caused by divorce.

Where TiMER does score is in its exploration of what the device means to things like spontaneity and those chance encounters that would be discounted as worthless if a wrist device didn’t go off. I think dating websites are a great thing and they have helped a great many people but I have always felt that by typing all of your specific information into a database which a computer then matches with someone you eliminate some of the organic process that can be called things like ‘ships in the night’, or when you refer to ‘sparks flying’ when you meet a new person and have chemistry with them. By meeting someone through a perfect compatibility system you eliminate the possibility of ever having those little tiffs and arguments that add the fire to the relationship and that make things all the sweeter when you eventually make up again. The film takes this into consideration as you watch a character so beholden to the device on her wrist that she almost throws away the chance for happiness several times. There are occasions during the movie when you just want to grab the characters and shake them up so that they don’t do something silly based on a wrist watch.

This being a romantic comedy, you would think that it would connect the dots and follow the typical three-act arc that leads to the main character learning a lesson and everything being wrapped up in typical happy fashion. Without going into spoiler territory, it is refreshing to say that whilst lessons are indeed learnt, TiMER will not end the way that you think. Emma Caulfield (Anya from Buffy the Vampire Slayer) is another one of the former Scooby Gang who has never really broken out into stardom and is arguably the most talented. Not only is she cute as a button but she is also very likeable, making this role sing when in another actress’s hands it could have been annoying. Whilst the character has echoes of Bridget Jones and is similar to the heroine of many a rom-com, the fact that we don’t see Caulfield that much make it feel refreshing.

It’s been a long time since this writer has seen a romantic comedy that’s actually enjoyable, and the fact that this one has a very real message at the core and manages to make you think is something to be encouraged. With Valentine’s Day just around the corner, TiMER is a likeable and smart film that is ideally suited for an evening with your loved one.

Extras: None

Review: Teen Wolf (PG) / Director: Rod Daniel / Screenplay: Jeph Loeb, Matthew Wiseman, Tim Hayes  / Starring: Michael J Fox, James Hampton, Lorie Griffin, Susan Ursitti, Jerry Levine, Mark Arnold / Release date: (UK) February 6th

More Back to the ‘Fur’-ture than Back To the Future (Michael J Fox’s other – and rather better – box office hit from 1985) Teen Wolf, like its titular lupine hero, is a curious beast.

It’s a lightweight High School fantasy parable which tells kids to hey, just be yourself, you don’t need to be a freak and, of course, hailing from the decade that taste forgot, it’s full of bad hair, bad fashion and seriously bad thumping synth music. But, despite concerning itself with a boy who can turn himself into an animal, it’s not remotely interested in being scary – no one really bats an eyelid when Fox’s Scott Howard turns into a wolf in the middle of a basketball game. It doesn’t, clearly, take itself too seriously but then it’s also not even remotely funny with a flat script devoid of wit and with no real stakes for anyone to play for unless you’re particularly bothered by the outcome of a basketball match. But we have to remember that this is 1985 and Teen Wolf understandably has more in common with the Ferris Bueller generation of teen movies than the slightly edgier fare kids are used to in the 21st century.

Teen Wolf is all about Scott Howard, a something-and-nothing seventeen year-old whose ideal girl is dating a dork (hey, this 1980s-speak is cool) and whose basketball team is a flabby waste of space. Scott notices strange things happening to his body, the strangest being his total transformation into a cuddly-looking werewolf. He discovers it’s a genetic thing when it happens to his father too but, instead of going on the expected slaughter rampage Scott, who retains his own personality when he’s a wolf and can turn his transformations on and off at will, uses his animal strength and agility to drastically improve the fortunes of his ailing basketball team. As you would. He also pursues his love interest, clashes with her jock boyfriend, and fails to recognise that his best friend (the curiously-named ‘Boof’, played by Susan Ursitti) is also probably his soul mate.

Teen Wolf is so painfully a product of its time it’s hard to be subjective about it coming to it for the first time twenty-odd years later. It’s throwaway stuff, not especially engaging or well realised – Fox’s werewolf costume is laughable – and the script completely ignores any real-world consequences of a boy turning into a monster. It’s just accepted amongst his contemporaries and no one’s really much bothered about the hows and whys beyond the fact that it makes him a great basketball player. It makes him a great dancer too, apparently, and I think my patience might have finally run out when the wolf dresses himself in a white Saturday Night Fever suit and strikes that Travolta pose before sauntering off to throw a few 1980s shapes at the High School dance.

Teen Wolf is cheesy and harmless with no sense of danger or excitement and absolutely no sense of believability. Fox rises above the limp material and emerges with his reputation pretty much intact (even though he was later said to have remarked “I have no idea what I thinking of” when recalling his participation in the movie) but ultimately this film – and indeed, this crisp and colourful budget-price Blu-ray release – is for nostalgists only and those who fondly remember not only Teen Wolf but also an era when Hollywood could get away with putting out truly trashy teen twaddle like this with a straight face.

Special features: Trailer + ‘sneak peak’ preview at the recent MTV series which shares the name.

Review: Perfect Sense (18) / Directed by: Jourdan McClure / Written by: Kevin Huskin, Ryan Finnerty / Starring: Michelle Page, Art Alexakis, Chris Coy, Michael Cudlitz / Release date: Out now

A woman scantily clad in a white night dress, covered in blood and bruises, cries on the shore of a calm river. The woman holds a magnum 45 in her hand which she holds to her temple and blam! So begins Rogue River and experienced horror fans will realise we are in the dark heart of America again. It’s a wonder anybody ever goes anywhere anymore in Middle America, recent movies will have you believe there is a rapist or mad Christian behind every picket fence. Whilst it reverts to the old staple of sexual humiliation sadly prevalent in a lot of horror currently, Rogue River is so slight that it barely registers during its 78 minute run time.

The film starts with our heroine Mara (Michelle Page) bidding her brother farewell and travelling into the countryside to scatter her father’s ashes at the titular calm river. At the river she meets a friendly passer-by, Jon (Bill Moseley) who shares with her some observations about loss and death. Mara then finds her car has been towed and Jon kindly offers her a lift into town, they stop off at Jon’s house and meet his wife Lea (Lucinda Jenney) who is also nice enough and convinces Mara to stay for dinner. Unable to get in touch with the local Sheriff, Mara eventually ends up staying the night after a nasty accident involving her hand and some broken crockery. It’s clear that something is wrong with these two and as the night goes on they exhibit increasingly bizarre behaviour and a bloodied and desperate man shows up at the patio doors. Turns out that due to Lea being stricken by cancer and Jon feeling devastated by this news the two of them are desperately trying to start a family and have been kidnapping unwilling victims who are abused and tortured should they not play along. When the Sheriff and Mara’s brother turn up looking for her, things start to spiral out of control into a cycle of violence and humiliation.

The plot could be the plot for any number of straight to DVD horrors of the last few years. Either I have become majorly desensitized to what I have watched in the horror genre recently or this film seems majorly tame. Whilst it could and often threatens to go full tilt into hardcore horror the film never quite gets there. The disturbing elements of this film revolve around character and performance which luckily are brilliant from all three leads. The film has some wonderful weirdness in the first half which really captures that feeling you get when you go for dinner round a weird couples house that you don’t really want to go to, you know the feeling, it’s the one that Come Dine with Me captures every so often. It’s also well paced with revelations coming gradually and without a sense of trying to rush to the next scare. There is a sense of creeping dread just under the surface as you watch these characters act strangely and are aware that at any moment they could snap. The husband and wife are played brilliantly by genre veteran Bill Moseley (The Devils Rejects) and Lucinda Jenney and it really feels as if you are watching a couple who have been together for years through thick and thin and have become horrifically jaded through plain old bad luck.

All of this could contribute towards a great gothic piece of Americana but truthfully apart from being richly photographed by Brian Hamm, Rogue River doesn’t have a whole lot else going on. By the last 30 minutes the creeping dread and careful plotting have given way to lurid incest plotlines and shock tactics. It’s like the creators had this great story off the beaten path and decided to bottle it and go the same route as so many other films so that they could at least guarantee distribution. I’m no idiot, I know what sells in this day and age but for a brief moment here I thought I was going to get the next The People under the Stairs by way of Twin Peaks and because Rogue River isn’t that film, it’s ultimately a disappointment.

Review: The Fades (12A) / Directed by: Farren Blackburn / Written By: Jack Thorne /  Starring: Lily Loveless, Daniel Kayuula, Ian De Caestecker, Sophy Wu, Johnny Harris / Release Date: Out Now

Let me start by saying that I do not think I am the target audience for this series from ‘yoof’ centric BBC3. Based on that you may wish to disregard my opinion entirely or continue reading but I think it’s clear to make that apparent before starting this review. I would like to think that if I were seventeen years old and everything about The Fades appealed to me, I would still know enough to know I was being patronised and generally talked down to. The Fades doesn’t have an original bone in its body and worse it’s crass and lowest common denominator entertainment from the BBC who have brought us Being Human, Sherlock, Luther and Torchwood in recent years and that’s simply not good enough.

The Fades follows teenager Paul (Iain De Caestecker) a sixth form student who after apocalyptic dreams suddenly can see dead people all around him. He is contacted by Neil (Johnny Harris) who speaks in vague terms about dead things and educates Paul that the spirits he is seeing are known as ‘Fades’ and are spirits who have yet to ascend. Neil and his small clan of followers are known as ‘Angelics’ as they can see the Fades and some even have healing abilities although why is never clear. Some fades have been around for a while as there seems to be a problem with ascension; they have grown frustrated and started to rot. They have also discovered that by eating the flesh of the living they can become corporeal once more. An old vengeful fade from the 30s is building an army of resurrected fades and Paul is all that stands in their way as he is a more special angelic than most and is able to heal and kill fades at will. That’s about it for the main plot, there is also some shenanigans about a school teacher who is a bit of a ladies man missing his old wife who is now missing and actually a fade, a half arsed romance between Paul and quirky student Jay (quirky=short hair) and Paul is aided by his best friend Mac (Daniel Kaluuya) who will give you a pop culture reference even in the face of certain death.

The producers of The Fades must have looked at everything that has been popular in mainstream media over the last ten years and just decided to chuck it all into a pot and see what happens. The first few episodes have the vague surreal plotting of Lost. The main plot is similar to any number of Supernatural episodes. The show has True Blood’s gratuitous sex and swearing. It has The Inbetweeners’ level of sex references and smutty humour. The acting and characterisation is all right out of Hollyoaks and most insulting of all, the writers have looked up words like Nerd or Geek on Wikipedia and therefore created the Mac character, possibly the most annoying character in TV history. The actual plot and mythology make very little sense and the rules seem to change depending on what mood the director is in. I haven’t even mentioned the unnecessary John Woo impersonation in the last episode or the fact that the Fades’ eating habits are right out of a zombie movie.

In the worst thing in a catalogue of disastrous decisions is the casting of Ian De Castecker as our ‘hero’ Paul. The character is such a wet blanket, walking around in his skinny jeans and Christmas jumper delivering lines in a wooden puppet wide eyed way that says more ‘potential serial killer’ than ‘saviour of humanity’. It’s hard to believe that anyone would follow him into battle, let alone a quirky schoolgirl would fall for him. It would be nice if I could say that this was all down to the poor writing but it seems to be partly miscasting as well. Daniel Kaluuya, once so impressive in Chatroom and recently in Black Mirror has pretty much killed his career and any goodwill he bought with genre fans thanks to this character. Mac will spout shoe-horned-in comic and film references in any situation and not even in a charming Seth Coen from The OC kind of way; no, most of the references make no sense in the circumstances or are downright inappropriate. Case in point; there is a part in the final episode where it looks like Mac and Paul’s sister are about to get eaten alive and somehow this seems to be a good idea for Mac to confess his love/profess he learnt life lessons from Spielberg’s E.T. Worst of all this character breaks the fourth wall and gives us series re-caps at the start of each episode. It’s so contrived and utterly pointless that a character that should have been a likeable focal point is rendered worthless. The one character that has an interesting arc is Neil, the jaded angelic, who has a past that is only hinted at, but again the character is saddled with bad dialogue and wooden delivery from Johnny Harris. The interesting things about this character come to the fore towards the end of the series but by then it’s too little too late.

The Fades begins unnecessarily vaguely evoking the storytelling style of many mysterious modern TV shows, around the halfway point it becomes apparent that this is just a pretentious zombie invasion show and becomes a bit more interesting when it starts to rip off The Faculty (itself a rip off of something, see how low this show goes?). I will say that The Fades has a good level of production value and is confidently staged by Tom Shankland and Farren Blackburn. The feel is quite epic when the town is evacuated and it has an explosive finale. Of course like most things in The Fades, this falls apart when you realise that a town has been evacuated due to what amounts to a couple of people exploding at a school and if the police give up that easily then we are truly all doomed and that the effects heavy finale makes no sense at all.

The Fades was partially filmed just down the road from where I am writing now (again just like The Inbetweeners funnily enough). I feel embarrassed for my local community and embarrassed for the BBC spending money on this bloated and dire endeavour and hope to God there will not be a second series.

Extras: Mac Explains (arrrgh!!), Extra Scenes, Deleted Scenes, Behind the Scenes featurette, Outtakes.

Review: Perfect Sense (15) / Directed by: David Mackenzie / Screenplay by: Kim Fupz Aakeson / Starring: Ewan McGregor, Eva Green, Denis Lawson, Ewen Bremner, Connie Nielson, James Watson, Caroline Paterson / Release date: 30th January 2012

“It’s about what it means to be human.” If I had a shiny shilling for every time I’ve heard this cliché trotted out by some desperate producer, actor  or screenwriter in an attempt to give some credibility to their humdrum science-fiction movie or TV show I’d have a big bulging bag of admittedly-unusable currency cluttering up the place by now. But I won’t be coining it in for Perfect Sense (even though the term is used twice by actor Ewan Bremner in one of the DVD’s special features) because, just for once and at last, here’s a film which really and absolutely is all about what it means to be human and, more terrifyingly, what it means to lose that humanity.

Last year Starburst created the term Artmageddon to describe a string of end-of-the-world films which weren’t all about spectacle and special effects but which used the idea of the world ending (or some equally big SF concept) as a backdrop to a more intimate human drama. It was a term we quickly appended to films like Melancholia, Take Shelter and Another Earth, art house films which don’t have the budget for the spectacular and which aren’t, in any case, concerned with such multiplex frippery. These are more considered, character-driven pieces, often slow and measured in their pace but almost always movies likely to linger longer in the memory than the most recent Transformers movie or more typical apocalyptic hokum like The Darkest Hour. We can now add Perfect Sense to the ‘Artmageddon’ list; an understated, quiet British film which slipped into the cinemas in October last year and then, criminally, shuffled away virtually unnoticed. As ‘Artmageddon’ movies go, Perfect Sense is head and shoulders above the rest of the bunch…

We’re in modern day Glasgow and serial womaniser and chef Michael (McGregor) is trying to avoid a relationship with scientist Susan (Eva Green, never knowingly-clothed) despite the obvious attraction between them. As their relationship stutters along the world starts to come off the rails as a strange virus attacks human senses – smell and taste are the first to go. But humanity adjusts, copes, starts to come to terms with its altered condition and hopeful scientists reason that the virus may spread no further, such is the connection between the two senses so far affected. But garbled messages from Bangkok about a worrying increase in cases of sudden deafness cause alarm bells to ring across the world and before long panic sets in and the infrastructure of society begins to crumble. During all the confusion, Michael and Susan become closer, their relationship so intense they’re almost able to blot out the changing world outside their window. But when the deafness virus affects Michael and he displays the rage and irrationality which accompanies imminent loss of hearing, he risks losing Susan forever and faces a life of silence and, possibly, something even worse…

I was bowled over by Perfect Sense. Tales of the collapse of modern civilisation have always held a morbid fascination but it’s an idea which has been done so often now that it’s hard to find a story which can bring something new to the end-of-the-world table. The ‘senses pandemic’ is a genuinely original idea, uncomfortably chilling because the film doesn’t offer up any explanation for it, it just happens and I suppose those of us fortunate enough to be in possession of all our senses and faculties will always have an unspoken fear of losing one or more of them. Perfect Sense reminds us how lucky we are and how easily we take for granted all those things around us which are so commonplace – our friends, our families, the simple joys of eating, speaking, seeing.

Whilst not a film intended to impress you with its visuals, Perfect Sense evokes the slowly-decaying society in a handful of powerful street-scenes depicting a panicked population and a city slowly going to Hell, patrolled by authority figures in protective suits herding the deaf indoors and promising them deliveries of food and water. Most striking of all are the sequences of emotional disorientation which precede each sensory loss – the ravenous hunger before the loss of sense of taste, a raging fury before the loss of hearing and a final glorious euphoria before the lights go out once and for all.

Despite having the gloomiest ending of any film I’ve seen since The Mist, Perfect Sense still manages to be life-affirming because, in the end, love conquers all and Michael and Susan, you’ll not be too surprised to learn, find a ‘happy’ ending of sorts. With dazzling performances from McGregor (acting with his uncle Denis Lawson for the first time) and Green and a mature and intelligent script, Perfect Sense is absorbing, disturbing, challenging and unsettling. It’s also quite unique and really quite brilliant.

Special features: just a brief interview snippet with McGregor at the film’s Edinburgh premiere and a ‘making of’ featuring Lawson, Bremner and the Director’s brother Alister Mackenzie who appears in the movie.

Review: Fright Night (15) / Directed by: Craig Gillespie / Screenplay by: Marti Noxon / Starring: Colin Farrell, Anton Yelchin, Imogen Poots, David Tennant, Toni Collette / Release date: February 20th

I can’t seriously believe that a remake of the cheesy 1985 Tom Holland original Fright Night would really have been particularly high on Hollywood’s to-do list if not for the enduring current popularity of vampires courtesy of the – whisper it quietly – Twilight franchise and its photocopied rip-off TV series The Vampire Diaries. So it’s not a huge stretch to imagine some Hollywood bean counter looking through the back catalogue for any previous vampire hit which could be resurrected, dusted down and given a modern make-over.

So here we have Fright Night, shorn of the thudding synths, big hair and unbelievably-irritating Stephen Geoffreys (Evil Ed) of the original, scrubbed up and given a bit of a post-modern makeover and a slightly darker screenplay courtesy of former Buffy the Vampire Slayer scribe Marti Noxon. While Fright Night 2011 might not have been the most necessary remake of all time, it’s actually a pretty good one, playing to the strengths of the original and replacing the dodgy bits with some real scares, tension and an appreciably more terrifying vampire bad guy with Farrell’s Jerry Dandridge considerably more feral and animalistic than Chris Sarandon’s often  urbane and domesticated vampire from the original (although he still shares the former‘s taste for apples).

As in the 1985 movie, our High School hero Charlie Brewster (Yelchin) discovers he’s living next door to a vampire but no-one believes him. He enlists the help of sleazy TV showbiz showman Peter Vincent (David Tennant) but he’s quickly kicked out by Vincent who dismisses him, perhaps understandably, as a nutter. Before long vampire Jerry goes seriously psycho, blows up the Brewster home and sends Charley, his girlfriend Amy (Poots) and mother (Toni Collette) on the run into the wilderness around Los Angeles and all Hell breaks lose before Vincent finally, reluctantly, agrees to help Charley finish off Jerry once and for all because it seems that Vincent knows a bit more about the undead than his tacky TV persona might suggest.

This is rattling good stuff and, whilst there are moments of humour in the script, the emphasis here is on making a darker, scarier film than the original. There are less high school hi-jinks (Charley’s former geek friend Ed, played by Christopher Mintz-Plasse, gets short shrift but ends up fairly…er…‘armless) and more visceral thrills as blood pumps from gouged throats and vampires explode when exposed to sunlight. If David Tennant’s intention was to leave his goody two-shoes Doctor Who’image behind him via Fright Night’then it was a wise choice; his Peter Vincent is worlds away from Roddy McDowell’s fusty TV host of the original. Tennant’s Vincent is a Russell Brand-style lothario, all leather trousers and bare (if skinny) torso, his every utterance punctuated by the sort of language which would shame a sonic screwdriver. Farrell’s good value too; his Jerry is a lone hunter, lean and mean and quick to abandon his pretence at humanity when the need for blood becomes too great and he presents as an unstoppable, implacable demonic force far removed from the original Jerry who just became a rather silly monster at the end of Fright Night in 1985.

If there are any minor quibbles then they’re carried over from the original, with vampire lore casually rewritten so that the vampire’s victims are returned to normality on the death of the vampire himself (just so we can be assured a happy ending to Charley’s romance with Amy) and whilst this version of the movie is more intense than the original, some of the humour occasionally unbalances the film where the 1985 version was pretty much farcical from the off.

Better then than the original but ultimately probably a bit of a pointless exercise, Fright Night is worth a look if you’re tired of the toothless vampires of the Twilight saga and it’s particularly worth your time to see Farrell clearly enjoying himself and Tennant acting resolutely against type. Good fun.

Special features: Not much on either format. The DVD boasts a few deleted/extended scenes and an unwatchable rap music video, the Blu-ray adds some bloopers, a brief guide to ‘how to make a funny vampire movie’ and Tennant as Peter Vincent basically introducing some clips of himself from the film which is about as pointless as it sounds.

 

Review: Red State (18) / Director: Kevin Smith / Screenplay: Kevin Smith / Starring: Michael Parks, Melissa Leo, John Goodman, Michael Angarano, Nicholas Braun, Kyle Gallner / Release date: Out now

18 years ago a young filmmaker from New Jersey wowed crowds at the Sundance Film Festival with his feature debut. That young man is now an established writer and director, adored by fan boys across the globe. His name is Kevin Smith and this is his latest offering. 

It’s been a long time since Smith turned in a film that showed the same promise as some of his earlier work. It would appear that for every Chasing Amy there would be a Zack and Miri Make a Porno. But Smith is an astute filmmaker and now (somewhat reluctantly) a smart businessman. In the interim, between movies, Kevin Smith has built a commendable online network via his Smodcasts on S.I.R! and the truth of it is, that with every Copout comes a paycheck that funds his growing empire.

But Smith’s endgame isn’t to become some kind of megalomaniac industry God. By his own admission, he’s ‘just a guy who wants to tell stories’, and in playing the industry at its own game, Kevin Smith has found a way to tell stories that Hollywood wouldn’t give the time of day. Red State is undoubtedly one of those stories.

Those who like their movie genres defined with a nice neat bow, turn and run away screaming now.

If you’ve seen the trailer for Red State then you might think you have an idea what kind of a movie this is. Honestly, you couldn’t be more wrong (if you want a trailer which sums the film up better, check out Smith’s own edited example in the Extras). This is far from a ‘teens captured by backwards rednecks’ horror movie (although there are certainly elements of that). While Jared, Travis and Billy Ray do find themselves a little tied up (and not in a good way) after an attempted three-way with a Texan MILF, their plight is just one element of a much larger story.

Describing how the film throws your expectations out of the window time and again is incredibly difficult without explaining why. Suffice to say, there is no point at which you are allowed to feel comfortable during this highly unpredictable film. Red State bludgeons your expectations at every turn, to a point where, just before the final scene, you begin wondering if things really are about to go biblical. The fact that Smith can take you so willingly to such a potentially incredulous place is testament to his immense talent.

In fact Smith’s greatest attributes shine throughout. The dialogue is up to his usual conversational high standard, the script is well crafted and brave in every respect and his direction is (as always) honest and unobtrusive. What is key here though is the film’s most important message, summed up perfectly by one of the film’s final lines of dialogue: “People just do the strangest things when they believe they’re entitled. But they do even stranger things when they just plain believe.” 

Smith is far from on his own in bringing this story to life so convincingly. While the teens provide the right amount of angst and (brief) comedy, it’s the understated performance by John Goodman and the powerhouse turn by Michael Parks that really knock you for six. I have no doubt that Parks will be overlooked by Oscar, but by God the man deserves one. Notable by their absence are the plethora of actors who usually appear in Smith’s films. But then, this is a very different film to anything he’s made before. In fact, this is a very different film to anything anyone has ever made before.

Shocking, powerful and brutal, Red State is a must, not just for fans of Kevin Smith, but for fans of cinema that challenges you.

The Extra Features:

Kevin Smith’s intense passion for film drips from every added feature here, a fact enforced by all of the bonus material coming prefixed with an introduction by the man himself.

In the time that Smith has worked as a filmmaker he has grown, and Red State is proof positive of that. The fact that this is his penultimate directorial turn breaks my heart. As you’ll discover in the in-depth Making Of documentary, once Smith’s final movie, Hit Somebody – a tale of a Canadian farm boy who discovers a talent for ice hockey violence – is complete, he intends to focus his attention on helping other young filmmakers make movies. A monumental gain for new filmmakers, but a huge loss for his audience.

Smith’s Sundance speech is also included here in full, along with a Conversation With Michael Parks, two Trailers and Poster Art. What’s missing, however, is a Commentary track, but then if this follows the business models of his previous releases, we can expect a two-disc edition to appear at some point in the future.

Review: Hostel Part III (18) / Director: Scott Spiegel / Screenplay: Michael D. Weiss / Starring: Kip Pardue, Brian Hallisay, John Hensley, Sarah Habel, Chris Coy, Skyler Stone / Release date: January 23rd

The first Hostel film was a solid hit when it was released in 2006, but along with Saw it was unfortunately labelled ‘torture porn’ and kicked off a wave of imitators.

Once you get past the initial lurid shock of it all, the film is a genuinely suspenseful and exciting piece that taps into the fear and paranoia of post 9/11. The sequel was half a very good film, director Eli Roth decided to focus on the rich bored men who use the services of Elite Hunting to get a high they have never experienced. Of course telling it from this perspective is a risky proposition so the other half of the film is a re-tread of the first movie with females instead of horny young males. The second movie flopped on release and Roth has not directed a movie since. It was perhaps inevitable that we would get a third film at some point, and perhaps even more predictably the film has gone straight to Blu-ray and DVD. What may shock you about this film is that whilst it’s no masterpiece, it’s certainly a lot more fun than you would think.

Our story begins with a neat reversal of the formula of the first movie where a Ukrainian couple is kidnapped by a shifty looking young American who drugs them. We then find ourselves in the company of soon to be married Scott (Brian Hallisay) and his best man Carter (Kip Pardue) who are on a trip to Las Vegas along with two other friends, Mike and Justin. Carter has an elaborate scheme planned where the four of them will be whisked off the strip and into an abandoned warehouse/club full of hookers so that Scott can have one final night of hedonism before marriage. Turns out that the Elite Hunting organisation from the previous films has moved their operation to Las Vegas, preying on the inhabitants of the dodgy venues found outside of the bright lights and glamour of the main strip. Mike ends up disappearing along with his date for the night and the others search for him. This leads them into all the death and mayhem that Elite Hunting specialises in.

One of the neat things about Hostel Part III is that probably due to budgetary reasons, they vary up the formula so that it feels different but is still recognisably a film in the franchise. Here the torture is not fetishised with long drawn out torture scenes, but are no less nasty. The violence that occurs is quick and desperate and usually very brutal as people fight to survive. The means in which the Elite Hunting operate has also been changed up so that the death takes place in a theatre like setting with the rich folk looking on and betting on things like, how many arrows from a crossbow will be used before death and how long it will be before a victim uses his family to beg for his life. It’s nasty stuff and hardly a positive portrait of the super-rich, but it works.

Director Scott Spiegel co-wrote Evil Dead 2 so he knows how to spin a good spooky yarn. Problem is he has never been that gifted when it comes to the visuals. If you have seen From Dusk Till Dawn 2: Texas Blood Money then you know what I’m talking about. Hostel Part III definitely looks every inch the low budget production that it is and at some points feels like a made for TV film. It loses the production value of the first two films which actually shot in Europe and really captured what it feels like to be in a strange country where nobody speaks your language. Without a huge budget you don’t get the filming on the real Las Vegas locations that a higher budget film might allow and much of this feels very sound stage bound. Luckily Spiegel provides some pleasingly surreal moments such as the woman murderer clad in a bizarre leather/alien outfit that kills one of the victims with a crossbow and also a death by cockroach ingestion.

The only face you may recognise from previous films is Kip Pardue as the slimy best man Carter.  Pardue’s natural arrogance works well for him here like they did in Roger Avary’s underrated The Rules of Attraction. He may never be a major star but he will have a long career playing rich creeps. The rest of the cast are adequate; they’re good looking enough and do a solid job of conveying terror but you are never going to shed a tear when one of them buys it.

Hostel Part III is a hell of a lot of fun. It has some major plot holes and lapses in logic in the final act but keeps you on your toes and isn’t the exercise in straight to DVD grot that I feared it would be. As a solid, late night, post pub watch it definitely does what it sets out to do and that is more than you can expect from most of the rubbish that ends up going straight to home video these days.

Extras: Commentary with Scott Spiegel and Kip Pardue.

Review: Chillerama / Directors: Adam Green, Joe Lynch, Adam Rifkin, Tim Sullivan / Screenplay: Adam Green, Joe Lynch, Adam Rifkin, Tim Sullivan / Starring: Adam Rifkin, Sarah Mutch, Ray Wise, Lin Shaye, Tania Raymonde, Eric Roberts, Miles Dougal / Release date: (USA) out now, (UK) TBC   

It’s the last night of the old Kaufman drive in, and as a final bow, they are putting on a bill of rare and unseen horror films. A great set up for the three mini films Chillerama has to offer.

The linking story, “Zom B- Movie” (directed by Joe Lynch) begins with Floyd (Miles Dougal) digging up his ex-wife for a bit of necro fun, only for her to wake from her eternal slumber and give him a nasty bite on the scotum, “You bitch! You bit off my bean bag!!” Left ball-less and oozing a neon goo, Floyd heads to his job at the drive in. Trouble is, everywhere he goes, and everything he touches gets infected with the goo. But, enough of that for now, as Cecil B. Kaufman (Richard Riehle) is ready to roll our first feature…

“Wadzilla” Directed by Adam (Detroit Rock City) Rifkin, this 50s atomic monster spoof stars Ray (Twin Peaks) Wise as Doctor Weems who has a revolutionary cure for a low sperm count. His test subject, Miles (Rifkin) takes the drug which is meant to increase the potency of his solitary sperm, but the outcome is not what they had hoped for. Miles now produces one enormous sperm, which is growing out of control and on the loose. This section sets the tone perfectly, a lot of fun with lots of gross out jokes and retro style bad SFX. Part Godzilla, part Fiend Without A Face and part American Pie. Plus throw in Eric Roberts as General Bukkake, you just know you’re gonna love it.

“I Was A Teenage Werebear“, by Tim Sullivan follows, and is a throwback to the 60s beach movies. It’s even a musical, dammit! Ricky (Sean Paul Lockhart, infamous for being the male equivalent of Tracy Lords when he started in gay porn films) is a clean cut college kid who is distracted by the leather clad bad boys, led by Talon (Anton Troy). Turns out Talon and his gang are Werebears, homosexual predators who are out to pay back those who haven’t accepted them. The wonderful Lin Shaye pops up for a second time (she also plays a hobo in Wadzilla) as the gypsy Nurse Maleva, who gives Ricky advice and recites an old saying that might be oddly familiar..

“Even a boy who thinks he’s straight, yet shaves his balls by night, may become a werebear when the hormones age, and the latent urge takes flight“

This section doesn’t resort to ridicule and playing it camp, despite the gay characters being depicted as the ‘monsters’, (although there has always been a subtle connection between the horror film monster and the fear of homosexuals) and it actually handles the whole ‘coming to terms with your sexuality’ bit well. Sullivan’s section is the weakest of the bunch, but still entertaining with some fun moments. It did remind me, however that I must watch “Curse Of The Queerwolf” sometime soon…

Next up, after another linking thread with the neon goo spreading like wild fire and seemingly turning everyone into mindless sex mad zombies (or your average teen)… “The Diary Of Anne Frankenstein“. Adam (Hatchet) Green’s contribution is a black and white, German language historical piece *ahem* Young Anne is in hiding with her family, but has found a book that belong to her Grandfather, who just so happened to be the mad scientist Frankenstein! “That is why we had to shorten our name“.

Hitler (Joel David Moore) finds the family, and the book and sets about creating a creature that will help him in his conquest. The monster (Kane Hodder) has a very Hasidic look, however, and refuses to kill for the Fuhrer. Taking a leaf from the Mel Brooks school of offensive filmmaking, Green manages to make a hilarious section, even if we’ve seen most of the gags done before (stunt men change colour, subtitles don’t match the dialogue, the monster even passes around the side of the sets like they used to do in It’s Garry Shandling’s Show).

Just as we are about to be ‘treated’ to our next feature, “Deathecation”, directed and introduced by the mysterious Fernando Phagabeefy (which may be for the best, since this movie is said to make the audience simultaneously open their bowels), the theatre is overrun with zombies, all frantically copulating with what ever they can find. Can our heroes escape?

Chillerama is a film I’ve been looking forward to for a while, being a fan of Creepshow and the Amicus films, and fortunately it didn’t disappoint. Much more of a comedy than horror (we don’t really care if our heroes escape) and full of OTT splatter effects, it’s kind of like The Kentucky Fried Creepshow, if you like. Packed full of in-jokes (“what would Simon Pegg do?”) and quick, throw away gags that will make you want to watch it all over again. So a success, then? Well, partly. This is a perfect flick to watch with your buddies on a boozy night in, but if you’re a lone viewer, you may fast forward to your favourite bits after you’ve seen it a few times. That said, it is very funny and is full of the kind of loving pastiches that horror geeks will love.

Hopefully Chillerama will be unleashed in the UK soon, until then, import the DVD/Blu-ray – If you don’t mind getting dirty and sticky – you won’t regret it!

Review: Dark Star (15) / Directed by: John Carpenter / Screenplay: Dan O’Bannon, John Carpenter / Starring: Brian Narelle, Dan O’Bannon, Dre Pahich, Cal Kunihold / Released: 23rd January 2012

In the days before Star Wars, science-fiction movies – what there were of them – were a rather different beast to the one they become post-Luke Skywalker and co.

After Star Wars (which wasn’t really science-fiction anyway, but let’s not get into all that here) the emphasis was on loud explosions, special effects, bigger and better aliens. With the odd notable exception it’s remained that way pretty much ever since. But before 1977 science-fiction movies could still be quiet, contemplative affairs, often tackling big social issues (Soylent Green, Silent Running) or presenting cautionary allegorical tales of worlds to come if Man didn’t take care of his planet (The Omega Man, The Andromeda Strain, the original Planet of the Apes). It was also a genre which allowed would-be filmmakers to imaginatively flex their storytelling muscles restricted only by their available budgets and their own limited experience. This is how films like Dark Star came to be made and it’s a tribute to the talents involved – many of whom went on to bigger (if not always better) things, that Dark Star especially manages to stand the test of time and remain one of the best sci-fi movies of its era; quaint, charming, funny and with a successully-realised sense of scale and vision which far outstrip the resources available to make the film.

Dark Star started life as a 45-minute student film directed by John Carpenter and written by himself and Dan O’Bannon (the latter would go on to write Alien, of course, and Carpenter’s uneven CV includes the classic 1982 remake of The Thing and far too many lesser movies in more recent years). Clearly taking their lead from the then-recent Silent Running Carpenter and O’Bannon’s story is set in the 22nd century where the small scout ship ‘Dark Star’ has been travelling through space, largely forgotten by the rest of humanity back on Earth, destroying small unstable planets which could potentially threaten future colonization expeditions. The crew of four (the Commander has been killed in an accident but he’s kept ‘alive’ in cryogenic suspension) are bored witless and probably half-insane, spending their spare time either gazing out through the ship’s observation dome, playing practical jokes or smoking cigars. There’s also the matter of a rather wilful and malevolent alien life form brought on board – it’s essentially a big red ballon with claws – which needs to be fed and watered even as it’s tormenting the crew. So life goes on aboard ‘Dark Star’ as it heads towards the Veil Nebula for some more random planet-zapping… but there’s trouble ahead as the ship’s developed a malfunction and one of the bombs has suddenly got ideas above its station.

If your idea of science-fiction movie heaven involves slick visual effects, snazzy cinematography and assured acting then walk away from Dark Star right now because its ricketty homespun charms will not be for you. By contemporary standards this is raw, ragged stuff – the special effects are so bargain basement they make bargain basement look extravagant and the acting by O’Bannon and co was never likely to trouble the Academy. Transformers kids may not be able to tolerate Dark Star because even its brief seventy minute ‘director’s cut’ is still sluggish, slow-paced and generally uneventful. But remember that this was a first-time effort by film students picked up and padded out for theatrical release and it really should be judged on those terms. And on those terms it really does manage to be a triumph if you can put away modern preconceptions (and especially if the film is one you recall and cherish from your youth) and appreciate what Carpenter and co were setting out do do here. Carpenter, for his part, does a good job of making the movie look ‘bigger’ than it is and he sets out the stall for his future movies right at the beginning, providing the memorable electronic score which in places, startlingly, evokes bits of the theme to TV’s Torchwood. Anyone who saw Dark Star at the time or on one of its numerous 1970s/1980s TV transmissions will fondly recall the clawed balloon alien and the final shot of one of the space-stranded astronauts surfing his way down to oblivion on a piece of spaceship debris before disappearing in a flare of light.

Dark Star is a genuine cult movie hailing from an era when science-fiction remained a bit of an unknown quantity and yet was still utilised as a method for telling intelligent stories about the human condition without the need for hundred foot robots smashing cities into smithereens. Thoughtful, quirky and genuinely off-beat, Dark Star will always have a very special place in the hearts of those of us who’ve lived with it for thirty years or more and yet it might still be capable of attracting a new and curious audience who are just a little bit bored with the vacuity and endless spectacle of so much modern genre filmmaking. Give Dark Star a go and get an idea of what it used to be like way back before the Death Star first hove into view and changed the face of sci-fi movies forever…