In the immortal word balloons of an EC comic book, 'Good Lord! Choke!' sum up the film Human Centipede 2 (Full Sequence).
Beginning where the first film left off, we pull back to view a creepy, greasy, spectacled, mole-like human named Martin (portrayed by newcomer Laurence R. Harvey) who is watching Tom Six's movie on a DVD player as he lives out his miserable life as an underground parking attendant.
A devout fan of the first Human Centipede, he keeps a scrapbook of newspaper clippings and photos from the movie underneath his bed that he relishes with delight each time he studies it. After all, if it’s written that the movie was 100% medically accurate, it must be true!
Believing that he can accomplish in real life what was fantasy on film, he finds his victims in the garage and takes them to an abandoned warehouse, amassing a group of people in order to create a 12 person human centipede.
He then lures the film's star from the first movie, Ashlynn Yennie who plays herself - under the auspice of appearing in a Quentin Tarantino vehicle - with the intention of using her as the first centipede in his dark creation.
Lacking any kind of medical training, he makes use of what household items he can find in his run-down flat, a home he lives in with his abusive mother (paging Norman Bates!) and uses the only anesthesia on hand - a crowbar to the head of his victims.
Human Centipede 2 (Full Sequence) is disturbing torture porn with psychosexual gratification thrown in, masquerading as a borderline pseudo snuff film.
Running a scant 88 minutes, it was like pulling teeth (and yes, there is a scene like that in the film) watching it. The gorehounds will salivate over the film as there is no shortage of shock value that's gone beyond pushing the envelope, including a world-class feces scene that Paul Verhoeven and the late Pier Passolini would be jealous not having thought of. Lots of close-ups of cutting, slicing and maiming are pretty grim, but the quick shot of a newborn baby being crushed underneath a car gas pedal seemed like Cannibal Holocaust meets Monty Python.
Dialogue is minimal (Martin doesn't say a word throughout the movie, but that's his character) and mediocre at that, with only a few good lines throughout. Overall, it’s a weak script full of plot holes and unappealing characters.
With the exception of Miss Yennie, the cast was mostly composed of first time actors looking for their big break (sure, performing at the Old Vic and getting into RADA is tough, but I'd have recommended pursuing any other avenue over appearing in this thing). The standouts are Viven Bridson as Martin's mother Mrs. Lomax, Maddi Black in a brief appearance as the prostitute and Bill Hutchins as the perverted, Lomax family physician Dr. Sebring.
I can see how the UK has banned this film. I don't blame them. Yet I'm sure if British readers really want to view it, they'll have few problems finding it in some form or another.
I don't know what they're smoking in the Netherlands nowadays, but I suggest Tom Six should stay away from the Bulldog Cafe.
This movie is 3D rated - Disgusting, Degenerate and Dumb.
Expected rating: 4 out of 10
The Human Centipede 2 (Full Sequence) is out now in the USA.