Global Warning
The C-Word is almost here so, against our better judgment, we decided to headline this issue’s Emporium with something snowy, albeit snow globes are not specifically an ornament exclusive to this jingly, tinselly, and jolly time of year. That being said, if all potential Christmas gifts were this cool, maybe we wouldn’t be too irked by that cut-price 20-pack of plain black/white socks that weasel their way under our trees every year. These horror film-themed snow globes from Gods and Monsters are the perfect thing to instil a bit of life force into any movie fan this time of year be it a black Christmas or a silent night, deadly night (we couldn’t fit Eraserhead into that pun-laden sentence but that’s available too – hey, we’re only human!).
These globes are brilliantly priced and each awesomely designed, with imagery from all the aforementioned movies. Who would have ever thought back when angry parents were protesting the release of a seasonal slasher for ruining the wholesome image of Santa that a couple of decades later, we would be immortalising that festive horror with a snow globe that could very well be sat on the desk of a high flying executive or (dare we say) the next big writing prodigy, naming no names. The set is bloody great but if we had to pick a favourite, we’d have to say the classy-looking The Thing. Nothing says happy Christmas like some stranded researchers in the Antarctic battling malevolent alien life forms and doing blood tests, or is that just our Christmases?
HORROR SNOW GLOBES (THE THING; ERASERHEAD; LIFEFORCE; SILENT NIGHT, DEADLY NIGHT; BLACK CHRISTMAS) – £10 EACH
ALL AVAILABLE FROM GODSANDMONSTERSRECORDS.COM
Suitcases of the Highest (First) Order
Kylo Ren, safe to say, has a bit of an anger problem, we’re not judging although we have heard some troubling stories from our stormtrooper contacts. Well, of all the problems a young wannabe Sith can encounter, one that must be a bit of an extra annoyance is all that travelling. Well, with this fantastic suitcase from americantourister.co.uk, you can save yourself from such unnecessary luggage stress and hold back from going all Ren and slashing the hell out of a fellow passenger’s back seat with your cross-bladed lightsaber. This case is superbly designed and vast, and is luxury case befitting a high-ranking member of the First Order, who always seem to believe that bigger is better (although that philosophy didn’t work out so good for Starkiller Base, but we digress).
4-WHEEL MEDIUM SPINNER SUITCASE KYLO REN – £139.00
AVAILABLE FROM AMERICANTOURISTER.CO.UK
Drink to the Future
Ever gotten so drunk you’d fail a Voight-Kampff test? Us too (usually around deadline time), which is why we’re extremely excited by this space-age offering from Hard to Find Whiskey. Now we can at least look classy gazing out onto a Manchester skyline that is becoming more and more like Ridley Scott’s rain-drenched, neon-soaked dystopia.
Designed by Cini Boeri in 1973 and still manufactured by the original Italian company, these hand-blown crystal beauties come either as clear as day or a black as Roy Batty’s heart. This glassware is so cool it may well prevent you waking with a Tyrell-ble head the morning after a night’s libations.
So if you’re going to drink Johnny Walker until you see attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion or majestically galloping unicorns, there’s no excuse not to do it in style… (Drink responsibly. Even on deadline.)
CIBI DOUBLE BLADE RUNNER GLASS (TWIN PACK) 37CL – £99.99
CIBI DOUBLE BLADE RUNNER GLASS – BLACK (TWIN PACK) 37CL -£109.95
AVAILABLE FROM HTFW.COM