No film has made this writer feel so anxious and tense quite like this one did. Mary Bronstein’s If I Had Legs I’d Kick You is an absolute masterpiece in exploring the struggles of a working mother who has the whole world against her. It’s strongly focused on mental health and the difficulty of balancing all your responsibilities, while also being a psychological horror relating to the sheer pressure mothers are put through from start to finish.
From the get go, the film sucks the viewer into its world of stress and exhaustion. Psychotherapist and mother Linda (Rose Byrne) has everything against her – a medically complex child who is just not getting any better, a husband who’s away for work, nightmare clients, a destroyed home, and personal trauma that is eating away at her; even just one of these things would drive anyone up the wall.
The exhaustion that Linda is experiencing is palpable, and you have no idea when she’s going to snap. Bronstein’s visual direction drags the viewer into this nightmare and amps up the anxiety – though absolutely stunning, it’s so nerve-wracking at the same time.
If I Had Legs I’d Kick You does a momentous job of exploring the struggles a mother, who is spread so thin, can go through when all she wants is a break or some help – because god forbid a woman enjoys a glass of wine and a cigarette after a long stressful day. This film deserves all the time in the world and is a shining entry in the feminist horror catalogue.

IF I HAD LEGS I’D KICK YOU is in UK cinemas now.


